


I Was Me, You Were You

by teenuviel1227



Category: Day6 (Band)
Genre: Enemies to Lovers, Eventual Smut, Fluff, M/M, Recreational Drug Use, some drinking, they're kinda in love online but don't know they're rivals in real life
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-07
Updated: 2017-10-15
Packaged: 2018-12-24 22:50:55
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 13
Words: 33,219
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12022731
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/teenuviel1227/pseuds/teenuviel1227
Summary: Music Majors Jae and Brian have been at each others' throats pretty much since they first met each other--rival guitarists, Brian is hesitant to pick up the bass, so when Jae gets picked as lead guitar for the graduating class's final performance, he contests the decision which leads to a crazy spiral of events. To escape stress, Jae (username: CutestChiquito) retreats online to Tumblr where he's been following a webcomic, HiHello by YoungK featuring a reality that mirrors his own--rival guitarists, simmering attraction.Or the Bri x Jae enemies to lovers fic no one asked for where they're confidants online and rivals IRL.Feat. Bernard Park as Jae’s roommate and the rest of the boys as Brian’s housemates.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * For [KIASK](https://archiveofourown.org/users/KIASK/gifts).



> Hi! I was primarily a Bangtan writer but I love Day6 and I couldn’t keep away--I'm looking forward to writing more for this fandom in the future. I hope you enjoy. :D
> 
>  
> 
> [Twitter](http://twitter.com/teenuviel1227)  
> [Blog](http://teenuviel1227.wordpress.com)  
> [CC](http://curiouscat.me/teenuviel1227)
> 
>  
> 
> Playlist (I'll update with all songs referenced/used as I go)
> 
> https://open.spotify.com/user/12159675821/playlist/1YX0i94BEtsZag1tnOrTHs

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> We’ve been living without knowing each other.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Lyrics are from Day6’s “Hi Hello”
> 
> Twt - @teenuviel1227  
> Tmblr - teenie1227
> 
> Playlist: https://open.spotify.com/user/12159675821/playlist/1YX0i94BEtsZag1tnOrTHs

“Jae--dude, can you just go to sleep? I’ve got a City Planning & Infra final early tomorrow. I kind of need my brain.”

Jae looks up from his computer screen, his face bathed in blue light. He sighs, watches his roommate Bernard pull the covers over his head, rustling in the twin bed across from Jae’s as he turns to face the wall.

“Bernard, seriously--it’s not even midnight yet.”

“It’s not like Snapchat, you know--”

“--what?”

“The damn webcomic will still be there in the morning.”

Reluctantly, Jae turns off the lights, and pulls his own duvet over himself and his laptop. He hits the F5 button again, glances at the clock. 11:59 PM. One more hot minute. He pulls up the tweet again: there it was, no mistaking it--the colorful display picture, the tweet sent 12h ago, along with a work-in-progress sketch of the first frame: Episode 28.

 

 **YoungKDraws** (@itrytodrawsometimes) 12h

New episode of Hi Hello goes up tonight at 00h KST, my friends! Sorry for the delay. Life. Has been damn hectic.

 

Jae hits the refresh button again. YoungK had never been one to post late, not in the past year-and-a-half or so that Jae’s been following his web comic anyway. It’s a pretty simple story: the kind of thing that you thought you were watching for casual entertainment but which ended up sucking you in whole. Jae chews on his lower lip in anticipation--bad habit. _I need to know what happens._

The main protagonist is named El Gitarista, a crime-fighter whose main power is synesthesia--brainy, quick-witted and bespectacled, he could see people’s intentions upon hearing how they spoke (the words came out bleeding scarlet red for malice, burning electric blue for indifference, shining gold for sincerity, dripping mustard yellow for fear). In turn, he could turn his music into physical weapons, taking power chords to a whole other level. C-Sharp Daggers, E-Minor bullets. By day, he was Kim Sungmin or Sunny to his friends--a shy if sardonic Tower Records employee, always reading a book at the counter, schooling people in music (“No,” one of Jae’s favorite panels went, “Halsey _does_ , in fact, make pop music.”). By night, he worked as a private detective-cum-superhero, doing the dirty work that police enforcement wouldn’t touch: helped get intel, information and sent it to the authorities to help take down syndicates, crooks, the bad guys.

His main rival is La Bahista, a vigilante who took justice into his own hands all over their small city, leaving a trail of vigilante killings in his wake. His main power was that he could create a forcefield with bass notes: whatever it was--whether it be the rumbling of an engine or the thumping of mattress springs against a bed frame against a wooden door, he could turn it into a fortress of safety. He was invincible. El Gitarista couldn’t read his intentions, didn’t have that half-step ahead of him. The last episode had been an intense showdown between the two, ending with El Gitarista pulling La Bahista’s mask off. The last frame was his face in panic, La Bahista’s mask loose in hand.

See, thing is: Jae has a theory, thinks he knows who it is, has read the entire comic more than five times through in the past two weeks he’s been waiting for an update. Sunny has a boyfriend--one of the other reasons Jae has fallen head-over-heels in love with the webcomic, having one foot in the closet himself--a funny, smart guy a little younger than him who works for the District Attorney’s office as a clerk, Sung Sejun or just Sej. He hadn’t seen it until the last panel, until he’d done the re-read: Sej is always wearing black and red whether it’s a flannel or a band shirt or just underwear in the steamier panels. Those were La Bahista’s colors: malice and deceit. Jae suspects El Gitarista’s powers don’t work not because of the forcefield but because he’s in love.

The clock strikes 12:00. Jae hits F5 again and waits for the page to load.

 

“Brian, please go to sleep, we’re begging you--” Sungjin says from the bed opposite Young K’s. Wonpil peeks from under the covers, adjusting the way he’s lying against Sungjin in the too-small bed. The entire duplex is quiet. “--for the love of all that is holy. Yunpillie has a final tomorrow.”

Brian rolls his eyes as he goes over the comic one last time before hitting the upload button. This is a big Episode for his characters--he’d been afraid that the reveal would be too obvious, that he’d been heavy-handed with the color palette, with the dialogue. He’d originally planned to get the chapter up a week earlier but he’d been pretty emotionally affected drawing and writing it as well. Sunny was finding out the love of his life was his number one rival for crying out loud--the next chapter would tackle whether or not Sej knew about Sunny being El Gitarista, something Brian is both looking forward to and dreading.

“Well,” he says, spotting a small typographical error in one of the captions. His pen moves smooth over the wacoal tablet, blurring out the period in favor of a comma. “If your sweet Yunpillie--”

“--only Sungjinnie-hyung can call me that--”

Brian pretends to hurl into the nearby trashcan. “You two are so gross. And like I said, if Wonpil has a final tomorrow maybe he can sleep at his own place for once.”

“Don’t be a jerk,” Sungjin says. “Don’t listen to him Yunpillie. You can stay here anytime you want.”

“Why are _we_ sharing the room again while Dowoon gets his own bedroom?” Brian hits save, export.

“Drums.”

“Right.” Brian sighs, drags and drops the images into the Tumblr window. “Well. Give me five minutes and thirty-two seconds, and I will be off your case.”

“You should get to sleep too,” Wonpil says. “Or Park Jaehyung is going to get the lead guitar spot tomorrow.”

“Hey,” Brian says pointedly, shooting Wonpil what he hopes is a menacing glare.

Sungjin groans. “Why did you have to bring Park Jaehyung up, Yunpillie? Now he’ll never go to sleep--”

“--okay,” Brian says, turning his back on his screen to face Sungjin and Wonpil. “For one thing, I was accepted into the Star Scholarship first, was given lead guitar first, and the only reason that they relegated me to bass was because Jae didn’t know how to play that. It’s a case of let whoever can understand be the one who ends up being understanding which is a load of bullshit--”

“--but doesn’t that mean that the entire dispute is hopeless--”

“--okay, how would _you_ feel if someone made you step down from your piano recital just because you could play the cello and they couldn’t--”

“--Park Jaehyung is really talented, though,” Wonpil says, wide-eyed. “It’s not like they made him lead guitar just because he was bored. And the bass is a good instrument. I don’t know why everyone wants to be lead guitarist anyway. Rhythm is the core of music. Strip that away and you don’t really have much.”

Sungjin waves dismissively at Brian. “Don’t try to convince him, Yunpillie. It’s hard to change someone’s mind when they have a crush.”

“Oh my god,” Brian says, scoffing, half-laughing at how ridiculous that sounds. “I would literally rather play bass or worse, rhythm guitar, all my life than do anything remotely crush-like with Park Jaehyung. He thinks he’s such a smart ass when really he's just an idiot who won't stop talking.”

Sungjin grins. “Whatever you say, Brian. Whatever you say.”

Brian sighs as he thinks of Park Jaehyung--hell tailored just for him: six-feet and gorgeous, sure, but also smug and extremely hyper, a combination made for a tension headache. Brian makes friends slow, it’s just the way that he’s always prefered it. That’s how he’d made friends with Sungjin--and eventually, Wonpil--and Dowoon: just kind of hung around them and eventually ended up lowering his guard, making jokes, sharing books, food, comics.

Park Jaehyung was just always in your space. He couldn’t help it. He talked too much, laughed too much, ate too much, got too close. And, of course, as Wonpil had so kindly pointed out, there was the lead guitar thing. Brian had worked his _ass_ off to get that spot in the final performance--and then Park Jaehyung and his Los Angeles ass had to swoop in and take it from him. _He made a La Bahista out of me and I’ll never forgive him._ He wonders if that’s why Bernard Park shifted from Music Production into Politcal Science  & International Affairs. If he had to work with Park Jaehyung _and_ live with him, something would have to give too.

Brian turns to his laptop screen. **_Upload complete._ ** He grins, bites his nails and hits refresh just to see how many people have gone and clicked on their e-mail notification. 50 views. Not bad for the first few minutes. A notification bubble pops up. Brian grins, his annoyance and all thoughts of Park Jaehyung flying out the window. _Of course._

The first comment is from one of Brian’s favorite commenters: of course he has no idea who he is, but his profile photo and handle had always made him laugh plus he left some pretty insightful comments in there too. He’d given Sej his nickname after one of his comments referring to him as “Sej bro”. @littlestchicken and a photo of the cartoon against a backdrop of stars.

 

 **CutestChiquito** (@littlestchicken) on **_Episode 28: I Was Me, You Were You_**

That was your best installment yet, part of me is dying a little. Did Sej know Sunny was El Gitarista? Part of me is hoping he didn’t. Not gonna lie, I kind of saw the revelation coming but not in a bad way. I went back and re-read the whole comic while waiting for you to post and you foreshadowed this really, really well. I’m interested to know more about Sej’s point of view. I’m just dying for _more._ Not to be that creep but this gets me through lots of stressful stuff and I just need to say thank you for taking the time to draw and to come up with incredible storylines. Looking forward to the next episode, but I could literally wait an entire lifetime. Take as long as you need. Hope real life is kinder to you these comings months! Been kind of stressed out myself.

 

Brian grins, hits the heart button. He turns off the lights, ignoring Sungjin’s grumbled _finally_ , and gets into bed. He pulls the duvet over his head and pulls the Tumblr app up on his phone, typing up a reply that he sends right before he drifts into sleep. He wonders if Littlest Chicken is cute--and then pushes the thought away. _You’ve got a guitar battle to fight tomorrow._

 

Brian drops his hard guitar case on the auditorium floor with a thud, dust kicking up against the leather exterior. He takes a moment to catch his breath--he’d woken up late and the one disadvantage of opting for out-of-campus housing was, well, that it was outside of campus. He’d had to run, had barely made it on time.

“Well, look what the cat dragged in,” Jae is already sitting on stage, legs crossed, guitar on his lap. He's wearing his usual hoodie, sneakers, baggy jeans. His glasses gleam in the bright stage lights, the shine of it catching his platinum blonde hair. He tosses it back, wiggles his eyebrows, a grin making its way across his face like lightning across a sky. “I thought you _wanted_ lead guitar, Kang.”

Brian lets out a guffaw, undoing the clasps on his guitar case, slinging his stratocaster across his chest before making it up the stage. “What I lack in punctuality, I’ll assure you I make up for in skill.”

“Boys, please. The last thing I need are two of my best Seniors fighting. The Music Production program isn’t a wrestling hall. Now let’s get started--if you two don’t behave, I’ll kick you both off of the final performance.” Music Production Director Kim Hae-sol snaps.

Brian takes his seat.

“Alright, you two. After today, whatever decision I make is final and if either of you start trouble, I’ll stay true to my word and kick you both off of the performance and you can be the first Music Production graduates ever to not perform on graduation day. Kapish?”

“Yes, Prof.” Brian says, glaring at Jae.

“Gotcha, Teach.”

“Now, let’s begin. This is the routine I’ve started up for you both--we’ll start with classical Mozart Serenade No. 13, jump head-first into Beatles pop with While My Guitar It Gently Weeps, move into some Jazz Funk improvisation, then transition into epic metal with Dragonforce’s Through The Fire & Flame, end back in warped classics with Malmsteen’s Far Beyond The Sun.”

“No Joe Sat?” Jae jokes.

“Mr. Park, I’m not in the mood. I've got a full day.” Director Kim taps his baton against the chair in front of him.

“That’s what you get for showing off,” Brian mutters under his breath, grins victoriously.

Jae hits him upside the head. Brian's guitar pick falls with a clatter to the ground. “Oops.”

Brian picks it up, shooting Jae a dirty look.

“One,” Director Kim says, voice booming in the auditorium. “One, two, three--”

They begin, Jae starting off with what he’s been assigned, the first half of Mozart’s Serenade no. 13, rendered in G minor. Jae’s tempo is amazing--Brian hadn’t expected any less, not after the past two years of hating his guts with a vengeance--every note is on point, every note hit, every slip and slide of the tempo shaking just right. Brian picks up as Jae hits his last rest-stop, taking the melody high, soaring--he’d chosen a unique kind of distortion for this, one he’d come up with and tweaked himself. It’s sharp, crisp, every melody and gallop of the melody refreshing, new, electric to Jae’s smoother sound aesthetics. As he plays his last note, Jae grins, sliding smooth into the trembling melancholic melody of the George Harrison classic. Brian half-closes his eyes, singing along in his mind, waiting for his cue.

Jae stands, caught up in the music, doing his signature half-strum, half-picking technique that Brian has always hated and been a little bit envious of. And then he starts singing, his voice smooth, soft, lilting.

 _Fucking show off._ Brian picks up the melody, both on the guitar and vocals, letting his guitar melody and vocals soar where Jae’s had floated, flittered. He let hit cut, sharp, curling around Harrison’s notes. He stands too, his chair falling behind him, as he goes into the solo, using the wang bar to create wobble, depth.

Jae looks up at him, meets his eye as he cuts into Brian’s melody with some solid funk-pop improvisation: staccato jumping right into a pop chorus. _The pop front is mine, Kang._ Brian shakes his head a little, grinning, not breaking Jae’s gaze. _Don’t fuck with me when it comes to bass, Park._ He waits for an opening, plays the guitar bass notes, plucking a catchy melody sure and steady. Jae improvises over it, smooth, both melodies unintentionally melding together.

“That’s enough--INTO THE DRAGONFORCE!”

This time, Brian goes first: the first solo sure and swift as he steps on his distortion pedal, the guitar metal effect crisp and quick as he tosses his pick to the side in favor of going in bare. Jae curses out loud unintentionally. It’s excellent--every note beautifully executed, right on tempo. _I’ll do better._ He picks up the chorus seamlessly, stepping on his own pedal, the distortion higher, shinier where Brian’s had been gruff, old school rock n’ roll where Brian’s had been gritty metal. Jae’s goes into the next verse, guitar playing excellent, using his pick to create improvisations and landing back on cue as the beat went. They joined up on the bridge, both their techniques mixing as they both went into the finale that they would be playing together: Yngwie Malmsteen’s Far Beyond The Sun.

Jae takes lead on the first solo, Brian playing improvised rhythm. His heart is raging against his chest from the exhilaration of the two melodies joining up, one steady, the other skipping--and then they reverse as they go into the next half of the song. Brian takes the lead, Jae switching to low-fi distortion to take the back rhythm, smooth, jangly against the sharp cuts of Brian’s guitar playing. They hit their pedals in unison as they go into the final bar, both playing the notes excellently, on the dot to the very last note.

The auditorium rings with silence. Jae is breathless, panting, trying very hard to glare at Brian, but really, just trying to catch his breath. Brian is looking at Jae, trying not to let it show that he’s just as exhausted, just as exhilarated, his shirt soaked through under his leather jacket. There’s nothing but the sound of heavy breathing.

“Well, you two troublemakers,” Director Kim says, looking down at his notes. “Looks like I have no choice. Park Jaehyung--”

“Yesssss,” Jae says, grinning excitedly. _HAH._

“But Director--” Brian protests. _Not fucking fair._

“--Park Jaehyung, Kang Younghyun, you both have lead guitar--”

“--what?” Jae asks, his voice cracking.

“Pardon me, Director? I thought you said--” Brian’s eyes are wide.

“A duet,” Director Kim says, grinning. “A seven-minute routine, split evenly between the both of you, in alternating fashion. I want a good arrangement, you may use other songs from other artists for 40% of the medley, but I need 60% of it to be original composition. You’ll not just present it on the day but also submit a recorded demo to me before the month is up. I’ll grade you 80% on guitar, 20% on vocals.”

“But the finals--” Brian interjects.

“--treat it as an exemption from your major exams, huh? Other kids would kill for something like this. It's basically a get-out-of-jail-free card.” Director Kim closes his notebook, is already making to leave the auditorium.

Brian and Jae watch in disbelief as the auditorium doors shut slowly.

Jae looks warily at Brian. _Full-of-himself, stuck up, unpleasant Brian._ “I’d rather go to jail.”

Brian scoffs, already unplugging his guitar from the amplifiers and walking down the stage steps. “That’s one thing we agree on.”


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> With a low voice, with a little bit of nervousness.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Lyrics are from Day6’s “Hi Hello”
> 
> Twt - @teenuviel1227  
> Tmblr - teenie1227
> 
> Playlist: https://open.spotify.com/user/12159675821/playlist/1YX0i94BEtsZag1tnOrTHs

“And you know what pisses me off the most?” Brian takes a swig from his beer before slamming it down hard on the bar. “The fact that Director Kim seemed _amused_ . He seemed so freaking happy like he’d figured out the secrets to the universe or something. _AH, yes. A duet._ I saw the light in his eyes. I had half the mind to point out the fact that it’s idiotic and kind of insulting.”

Dowoon tilts his head to the side, takes a sip of his strawberry Daquiri. He’s drumming with one stick on the counter, going at a syncopated beat as he signals the bartender for two shots of tequila--work hard, play hard.

“It’s actually kind of really smart.”

Brian’s eyes grow wide, a sardonic smile tugging at his lips.

“Are you joking? Do you _want_ me to kill you?”

Dowoon laughs, his voice deep, rolling. “Hear me out. Director Kim has lots of things to worry about, you know--for one thing, he’s Zion T.--”

“--yeah but he’s a professor first and foremost--”

“--no,” Dowoon says, shaking his head playfully. “First and foremost, he’s a musician. You and Jae have been at each other’s throats for five thousand years--some people think it’s when you were given bass instead of lead guitar during our second year performance but really it was before that. It goes back to when he entered the Star Scholarship and at the orientation, he offered you--”

Brian’s eyes grow wide. “--hey, I thought we don’t talk about that--”

“--well, he offered you the thing and you snapped at him. You were a jerk but he was an idiot too--"

“Wait, why was I a jerk?”

“Because if someone offers to go and help you move stuff from your van to the cramped duplex you’re going to share with two other friends and one of their extremely clingy boyfriends, someone doesn’t typically throw a drink in his face--”

“--well, I mean who was he to assume--”

Their tequila shots arrive. Dowoon slides one over to Brian.

“--that’s why I said he’s an idiot. Didn’t he ever read about guys who drive vans and wear black leather jackets, wear silver cross-earrings? What was he doing offering that kind of guy help?”

Brian laughs. “You’re tough but fair, Mr. Yoon.”

Dowoon grins. “I’m the youngest in our class for a reason. I’m a damn genius and you know it. Which is why I think Director Kim is right. You two have different techniques, you’ll learn from each other, come up with original material _and_ it’ll get you both off his back so he can focus on other things. Whatever happens from here on in is on you and Jae.”

Dowoon holds up his shot of tequila. Brian reluctantly clinks their glasses together.

“Don’t say our names in the same sentence like that.”

Bottoms up.

“Brian and Jae,” Dowoon says flatly.

Brian sighs, signals the waiter for another round. “Why do I hang out with you?”

 

 

“It’s just so--” Jae squints up at the ceiling from where he’s lying on his bed, a bag of Cheetos open beside him. The room is quiet except for the tapping of Bernard’s pencil against his textbook.

“--the five principles of city planning are: sustainability, efficiency, cost-effectiveness--” Bernard is sitting at his desk, eyebrows furrowed in concentration.

“--stupid, you know? What kind of solution is _that_ ? Why did he even call us in to audition, it’s such a waste of time. You know I practiced everything for almost two days’ worth in hours. Everything. Read the sheet music, learned all the finger work and then _improved_ it, tweaked all my distortions. And all it boils down to is that I have to share the spotlight with Brian Kang--”

“--cover under risk, and proper throughways particularly in the case of waste and sewage--” Bernard scribbles something down on his notebook.

“Maybe it would be okay if I was just sharing the spotlight but I actually have to work with him? Freaking _compose_ with him? It’s literally the worst--”

“--why do you hate him so much?” Bernard asks, turning to look at Jae. “I know Brian from freshman year and he’s a pretty cool guy. He composes well, sings well, plays guitar well, plays bass well. Kisses pretty well or so I’m told--”

“--TMI, Bernie.”

“Don’t ‘Bernie’ me. I see the way that he gets under your skin and all I can tell you is that it’s fuckin’ weird.”

Jae sighs, flopping over so he’s face-down on the bed. “It’s complicated.”

“Jae, don’t take this the wrong way but like--how complicated can having a rivalry with someone be? You read a lot of books, right? Didn’t you say that your High School teachers hated you because you couldn’t put the Murakami down? When someone hates someone the way you hate Brian, there are really only two ways you can bend the plot.”

Jae raises an eyebrow. “He could become my tether to humanity as I go off and find my lost childhood love who was also incidentally my dead bestfriend’s girlfriend only to find out that she’s already committed suicide? Or he could become the ghost of a high-class hooker named Kiki that recalls my shady past so that I keep on coming back to the elusive Dolphin hotel?”

Bernard laughs despite himself. “Sure. Why not--keep telling yourself that.”

Jae checks his phone, notices that he has an unread Tumblr notification. _Huh. Not a comment, a DM._ He clicks on it--smiles as the message opens. His heart skips a beat. Three paragraphs. Pretty wordy for Mr. Young K.

 

 **YoungKDraws** (@itrytodrawsometimes) 1d

Hey. Is this weird? I feel like it’s a little bit weird but I was heading to bed and I got your comment and it just seemed better to reply here than over on the page because what I have to say is a little bit long. First off, I want to say I really appreciate your enthusiasm and support. In a weird way, I feel like I kinda get to know you everytime you comment--maybe not personally but as a member of the human race. I find out about what resonates, what stories you’re interested in.

It’s funny that you mentioned how Sej’s color palette matches La Bahista’s. I didn’t really intend for that to happen but found that I was doing it so I just kind of ran with it--and then I was scared that I’d been too heavy-handed, that it’d be too obvious. I’m glad that you seem to think it fell somewhere in the middle. That’s what I was aiming for and you’ve been here with me for this stupid webcomic from the start so that means a lot coming from you.

Thanks for wishing me well. I really doubt things will turn out the way that I want--things have gone too far in a really stupid way but I’m an optimist so that really kind of sucks for me. You know how people go ‘who’s the real winner here?’--well, I’m never the real winner because the world shits on people like me. I’m always hoping things turn around and they hardly ever do. I wish that Sej didn’t know Sunny was El Gitarista but at this point, I’m kind of doubting it myself. How couldn’t he?

 

Jae smiles, a warm, fuzzy feeling in his chest. His cheeks feel warm. He hits reply.

 

 **CutestChiquito** (@littlestchicken) _Just Now_

Wow. NGL, a bit starstruck--thanks for taking the time to write back. Number one: don’t be self-deprecating. It isn’t a stupid web comic, it’s fucking amazing. I swear to god it’s gotten me through so much. And I know what you mean about the world shitting on optimists: I’m like that too. Always hoping for the best, never really knowing how to prepare for the worst. I had a pretty bad today; I’m going to have to work with one of the people who seem to hate me at work and I’m pretty bummed about it. But hey, if it makes either of our sorry asses feel any better, reading your reply after such a shitty day was ace. Goodnight, YoungK.

 

“Who you texting? Does his name end with Park, start with Jaehyung?”

Brian startles as Sungjin enters the room, Wonpil at his heels. The entire room spins--he’s still a bit tipsy from having drank with Dowoon. _How the hell can he have such a high tolerance?_

“No,” Brian says, making a weak attempt to throw his pillow at the lovebirds. “Can we not talk about it?”

“Fine.” Sungjin tacks a poster to the corkboard by the desk that they share. “By the way, don’t forget about the graduation party. All music majors are expected to be there. Yes, dates are okay. Yes everyone must get wasted.”

"I'm busy."

"You don't even know when it is yet."

Brian sighs. “If it's anytime within this period of my emotional torture, then I really don’t feel like it.”

Sungjin laughs. "It's on Friday."

Wonpil comes over to pat Brian on the head. “But you have to. Cute guys, you only graduate from college once, and Sungjinnie-hyung is organizing it as Student Body President of the College of Liberal Arts--so as his roomie, you _have_ to be there for support.”

“You already support him enough for everyone in the entire world, Wonpil,” Brian fires back. “And honestly, what am I going to do with cute guys when my entire academic future apparently rests on the one guy that I hate the most.”

“So you _are_ texting Jae!” Wonpil says, snatching Brian’s phone from out of his grasp.

Brian lets out a peal of laughter, not even making an effort to get his phone back. “No, you idiots. It’s this cool guy I know from online. He reads my comics and always has amazing input. We’ve been talking. I dunno. It’s relaxing, pleasant--the absolute fucking _opposite_ of Park Jaehyung.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry, YoungK. He's not quite the _opposite_ but ah well.
> 
> The coming chapters are going to be a bit more intense and will be up in a few days. :) Hope you enjoyed this.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I carefully say one thing.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I forgot to add the playlist in my last upload but it’s here now. :) I’ve been adding all of the songs referenced/mentioned so that you guys can better get a feel of what I’m saying, if you want to. It also just makes for good mood listening, I guess.
> 
> Also, some of the songs they refer to were made beknownst to me thanks to Des, to whom this fic is dedicated so thanks Des! :D
> 
> Lyrics are from Day6’s “Hi Hello”
> 
> Twt - @teenuviel1227  
> Tmblr - teenie1227
> 
> Playlist: https://open.spotify.com/user/12159675821/playlist/1YX0i94BEtsZag1tnOrTHs

Brian frowns. He should’ve known it wouldn’t go well. It’s Tuesday. He’s sleepy, in a really bad mood. They’re sitting in one of the practice studios, their equipment ready, phones hooked up to their respective Bluetooth speakers. The light is harsh. The power had gone funny, giving them around thirty minutes of just sitting around and trying to set up while waiting for the tech before they were able to do anything.

Brian sips from his iced americano, trying not to say anything mean or well, say anything at all--he knows that once he starts, he won’t stop. When he’d gotten the text from Jae saying he’d booked the studio for 9:00 am and that he could join him to brainstorm if he wanted or cared at all about their final performance, it had taken every fiber of Brian’s being (and Dowoon telling him not to be an idiot) to not reply with something catty, around fifty snappy comebacks streaming through his mind like a reel of film into a projector or, more accurately, bullets through a machine gun-- _right, thanks for consulting me first_ or _oh cause you’re in charge right?_ or _it’s very much like you to assume I don’t care about the project_ . Instead, he’d texted _K._ and had known he would regret it for the rest of his life, most probably. But Dowoon was right (when was he not?): just get it over with--the sooner the better.

Jae is sitting opposite him, legs crossed, guitar in his lap, distortion board set out in front of him. Today, he’s wearing an oversized gray hoodie, a pink cap with a heart on it. The room smells like vanilla and blueberries. Brian glances at himself in the mirrored wall of the production booth--old, wrinkled-ish Foo Fighters shirt under a black flannel worn over jeans. _You should’ve taken a bath._

Jae clears his throat.

Brian looks up, meeting his gaze.

Jae licks his lips, cringing inwardly, trying his hardest not to seem like he is high-jacking the project or like he was being overly nice in order to compensate for whatever biting insult he has at the tip of his tongue--which is the case. Whenever Brian does or says anything, it always brings him back to that first day when he’d said _Hey you want help loading stuff out of your van?_ And Brian had thrown the glass of ice-cold soda in his face. The one incident that had started everything, lead to this match made in hell.

“So. You can go first,” he says, not meeting Brian’s eye, just gesturing to Brian’s speaker, only noticing now that it’s in the shape of a burger. Jae bites back a small smile, wanting very badly to ask if that was a Juno burger phone reference. _This guy isn’t your friend._ “Well, if you want.”

Brian curbs his instinct to say _don’t do me any favors,_ instead nods and pulls his phone out, scrolls down to his Project From The Depths of Hell playlist. “I was thinking it would be good to open with something strong, something guitar-driven.”

St. Vincent’s Birth In Reverse comes out through the speakers, E into C-Minor into B, back into E. The guitars are playful, the distortion fuzzy-on-purpose, that electro-grunge feel pulsing over the bass. Jae listens, his heart sinking--he’d had something else in mind completely. He looks up, Brian is singing along, hits pause.

“Okay,” Brian adjusts his guitar, adjusts his distortion. “Of course, I’ve got original material too but just to kick it off. Imagine--dark room, then that solo goes off.”

 _The solo played by you, of course._ Jae doesn’t say anything. Brian starts to play the opening riff, his effects a bit smoother, a bit cleaner than the original but with something else added in too: a kind of slick depth to the melody that Jae would rather die than admit he likes.

“I was thinking we open with the guitar but go right into the chorus lyrics-wise because it doesn’t really make a lot of sense if we include the first two verses but don’t finish the song. So. Here we go.”

And then Brian sings and Jae wants to shrink into a hole and never come out of it: he’s always been envious of the kind of depth and range that Brian has, the way that his low to mid range still seems to soar, to lift off the ground like a plane content with being just-about-to-take-flight. _Never a dull moment._

 

Like a birth  
In reverse  
What I saw through the blinds  
You could say  
That I’m saying  
Phenomenal lies  
On the cosmic eternity  
Party line

 

“Mmm,” Jae mumbles when Brian finishes.

“That’s all you’re going to say?” Brian raises an eyebrow.

“Well,” Jae starts. “It’s different than what I imagined but I liked the improvisations you made.”

“Look, dude,” Brian says, recrossing his legs. “It’s not like you’re my peer counselor or something. If you have something to say, you can say it.”

“I know--look, why do you always think that I’m patronizing you? I’m trying to be civil, give constructive feedback and you’re accusing me of--”

“--I didn’t accuse you of anything, I just said that you could be honest.”

“You know, the very fact that you said I could be means you were suspecting me of not being honest. So. Yes, it’s different from what I had in mind but I didn’t hate it. Jeez,” Jae frowns.

Brian takes a deep breath, gestures toward Jae’s speaker that’s shaped like a yellow chick. “Okay. Your turn, then.”

“Fine.” Jae fishes his phone out of his pocket. “I can see where you’re coming from with the wanting to start off strong, but I was thinking of doing the opposite--”

Brian has to keep from rolling his eyes. He takes a sip from his coffee.

“--easing them into it, sort of setting the scene. So here.” He hits play.

The Crayon Fields’ Mirror Ball comes on, the slow fifties-esque beat slow but catchy, the guitars gentle, moody, the distortion almost completely clean, just a little bit of shine to it. The vocals are heavy on the harmonization. _Of course. Jae’s really good at harmonies._ Brian holds his breath, hoping to high heavens he doesn’t intend on having them sing the melodies together.

Jae hits pause. “So. Of course, as it’s a medley, I’ve thought up an arrangement too. I want to keep that trembling bit, at the beginning. I think it builds atmosphere. And of course, the opening riff--but then I’d consider just skipping the chorus and doing the two verses together. We could also take one verse each _if_ we decide to use it. Okay, here’s what I mean.”

Jae tweaks one of the pedals, turns on the small metronome he has on his effects board before stepping on the distortion. He closes his eyes a little as he starts to play the trembling guitar melody, the riff licking nicely at the rhythm as Jae’s voice enters, smooth, gliding over the melody. Brian frowns, he can tell that Jae has factored in where _he_ would sing, where the melodies would factor in. _Stop being irritatingly considerate, it’s condescending._ Brian feels a pang of jealousy as he listens to Jae’s voice curl around the melody: Jae’s voice has always had that special _something_ that unique, distinguishing quality that Brian couldn’t quite put his finger on. It was like melted silver, soft but strong, malleable but shining, splendid all the same.

 

Would it flatter you to know  
That mostly it’s you  
That makes me so slow  
You say I look calm  
But really, I’m not  
I’m not  
But I think I want to be from now on

Would it flatter you to see  
Me floating about wearing my love  
Even when it doesn’t suit me  
And I want to cause in this weather  
I can’t tell  
If everyone’s on heat or sun-stroked or sweating  
For no one  
I can’t tell

 

Jae strums the guitar a last time, looks up at Brian. Brian blinks. The light catches Jae’s hair where it peeks out from under his cap, the metallic frame of his glasses. Jae wonders what he’s going to say--did he like it? Did he hate it? Was he thinking of ways to improvise? To combine them? Brian’s lips are pursed, eyebrows furrowed, lashes casting long shadows on his cheeks.

“Well?” Jae prompts.

“It’s okay,” Brian says, shrugging.

“That’s it?”

“Well, what do you want--a play-by-play? I didn’t know I was supposed to become some sort of modern-day Lester Bangs if I practiced with you.”

Jae jerks back like he’s been slapped.

Brian is filled with regret as soon as the words leave his mouth. _Way to go, Kang._ He wants to say something in the way of sorry but something about the way that Jae had winced makes him feel a kind of shame, makes him feel unable to apologize--just wants to get out of here.

“I mean--okay, I liked it. It’s a good song. I like the melodies--”

“--hey, Brian, you watch Game of Thrones?” It’s Brian’s turn to wince at the sound of his name on Jae’s lips. He usually called him Kang or just didn’t address him at all.

“Yeah, why?”

Jae looks up at him, holds his gaze level. “Everything before the word ‘but’ is horseshit. Just spit it out, man. You hate me being nice to you right? So let me just be mean so that we can fight on your turf. Whatever you have to say, just fuckin’ say it.”

Brian frowns, runs through every way to turn the situation around but comes up empty, his defenses taking over. “I--look, if you’re going to make it in this industry, you’re going to have to be tough as nails--”

Jae lets out a sarcastic laugh. “--hah! If you’re going to change this industry, you’re going to have to start being nicer to people. Then maybe you wouldn’t have to go around telling people to aspire to rusty metal, huh.” Jae pulls the cord of his guitar out of the amp, starts to roll it up before tossing it into his bag.

“Hey, look--come on, man. Don’t be unreasonable, I was going to say that it’s a good arrangement but it’s a little bit weak as an opening.” _Okay, fuck. That came out wrong._ Brian frowns. “I mean no, that’s not what I meant, I just meant that as a guitar performance, it wouldn’t carry quite the same impact as--”

“--as a glass of ice-cold soda thrown in the face?” Jae quips. His hands are shaking as he takes the strap of his guitar off, packs his guitar back into its case--teal with different quirky stickers on it, most notably of the KRW 10,000 Chicken & Beer restaurant right off campus. “You know what, this was a mistake. You call _me_ when you’re ready to grow up.”

With that, Jae walks out of the studio room, leaving Brian to sit stock-still, staring at his empty chair--and his Bluetooth speaker, the yellow chick staring at him. _Fuck._

 

 

 **YoungKDraws** (@itrytodrawsometimes) _Just Now_

Goodmorning, CutestChiquito. Is it weird to call you that? Haha I know it’s an internet thing not to know names so I won’t push. Sorry I didn’t get to reply. I had a really shitty morning--sorry if this is coming off strange but I really don’t have anyone else to tell. I hate myself sometimes. It’s like I’m incapable of being kind to save my life. It’s like I just go on and on and my motor mouth gets the better of me. Insults like bullets, going off relentlessly for days. Hope you’re doing better than I am.

 

 **CutestChiquito** (@littlestchicken) _Just Now_

Oh, hey. HAHA I was just going to see if you replied (not a creeper, I swear) and saw you typing so I stopped typing and just kinda waited (really--not a creeper, promise). Well, do you want to talk about what happened? HAH speaking of shitty mornings, I had a pretty terrible one myself. I’m not sure if I should feel proud or guilty--maybe a bit of both. I have the opposite problem: I just overcompensate with niceness until I snap. Wouldn’t it be nice if we could trade talents? I think you’re plenty nice, in case you didn’t know.

 

 **YoungKDraws** (@itrytodrawsometimes) _Just Now_

Haha, not creepy at all. Kinda cute, if I’m being perfectly honest. Thanks, let me be nice to you to compensate for what a terrible person I am in real life. Also--hey, morning there too? So we’re in the same timezone, I’m guessing?

 

 **CutestChiquito** (@littlestchicken) _Just Now_

Fancy that, coulda passed you on the street and not know that. Also, yeah. Spoil me with niceness, please. Remember that nasty co-worker I was talking to you about? Got hit in the face with a suckerpunch of nastiness today.

 

 **YoungKDraws** (@itrytodrawsometimes) _Just Now_

Gladly. What is it with shitty co-workers, huh? What do you do for work--if that’s not too personal to ask? I’m still a student. Hope that doesn’t make me sound infantile.

 

 **CutestChiquito** (@littlestchicken) _Just Now_

Not at all. Actually, I’m a student too. Um. I just said co-worker cause it sounded more professional. I hope _that_ doesn’t make me sound infantile. (Kinda probably does though)  


**YoungKDraws** (@itrytodrawsometimes) _Just Now_

Nah. We’re all co-workers in the big, corporate machine of life.  


**CutestChiquito** (@littlestchicken) _Just Now_

Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhaha you can say that again.  


**YoungKDraws** (@itrytodrawsometimes) _Just Now_

“Nah. We’re all co-workers in the big, corporate machine of life.  


**CutestChiquito** (@littlestchicken) _Just Now_

Smartass.  


**YoungKDraws** (@itrytodrawsometimes) _Just Now_

I try. ;) Oh crap, my housemate’s home. Ttyl.

 

 **CutestChiquito** (@littlestchicken) _Just Now_

See ya round. ;)

 

 **YoungKDraws** (@itrytodrawsometimes) _Just Now_

You too, Chiquito. The cutest one.

  


“BRIAN!” Sungjin’s voice calls up the stairwell.

Reluctantly, Brian gets up off the bed, still grinning like an idiot. _From feeling terrible to internet flirting all in one day. Christ._ He walks to the narrow staircase, peeks down at Sungjin standing on the bottom steps.

“What?”

“Help us load the keg for the party on Friday from the liquor store into the venue? We need an extra car--well, van.”

Brian frowns. “Jeez how many kegs did you guys get? How many cars do you currently have?”

Wonpil grins sheepishly. “Well--none--”

Brian groans, reaches for his keys from the hook on the wall, twirling the ring around his finger.

“Fine--but consider this my support, alright? I’m not going to the party. I just wanna stay home and draw.”

“Weeelllll--” Sungjin says, stuffing his hands into his pockets. “--about the venue.”

“I’ve got enough gas to make it across the river.” Brian jogs down the stairs, hand skimming the railing. “Where is it?”

Sungjin shoots him a sheepish grin. “Here.”

 

 

“Oooooh lookin’ snazzy, Bernie,” Jae says, jumping on the bed, freshly bathed in his pajama bottoms and a big shirt. He uses a face towel to try his hair. It’s Friday night--he’s just come home from a riveting game of basketball, himself versus a couple of guys from the Architecture block. They’d beat his ass--but no one needed to know that. He feels a lot better, the adrenaline running through his veins, endorphins washing away the rather unfortunate events of last Tuesday. Plus, there’s been the YoungK thing, whatever that thing turns out to be, for now Jae clings to it like a tether to his sanity. Their messages had become more and more frequent, sometimes almost like they were having conversations in real time, sometimes like they were writing letters--long anecdotes, short and flirtatious notes, book and music recommendations. _It has been a while since your boy had a crush--even if it’s one he’s never seen, will probably never meet._ He looks at Bernard, the image of his usually studious, hoodie-and-sweats friend getting all dressed up suddenly clicks. “You got a hot date?”

Bernard turns in the mirror--he’s wearing a white button down over blue denims, red Converse. “Do I look too--formal-like? I dunno. It’s not really a date. It’s kind of stupid. You ever go somewhere just hoping someone would be there?”

“Oooooh.” Jae wiggles his eyebrows. “Lover boy Bernard in the house--or should I say NakJoon?”

“Shut up,” Bernard says, smiling as he combs his hair back. “I totally regret telling you my Korean name. You’ll never let me live it down.”

“Well, NakJie--that’s just what happens when you make the mistake of forcing me to go to sleep early every damn night. Until you plan that city that’s going to be the new Athens, you’ll be No Fun NakJoon to me.”

“Thanks, Jae. I really appreciate the support.”

“Sooooo,” Jae grins. “Anyone I know? Oh my god. Let me guess--is it Momo? Cause if it is, I will never let you live it down--no wait, is it Coco? Cause if it is, dude, you should go as a Minion. That’s like, the one thing that’ll get her attention.”

Bernard meets his eye in the mirror. “Shut up. That’s clever. Why didn’t I think of that.”

“Oh my god,” Jae clutches his stomach in laughter. “You like Coco? How does that song go? I’m in love with the Coco--”

Bernard pummels him with a pillow. Jae laughs until he’s winded and Bernard tosses the pillow back onto his bed. When Jae sits up he’s hit by his hoodie square in the face.

“Dress up. You made me extra nervous, now you’re going to be my get-out-of-jail-free card in case things don’t go well.”

“What!” Jae sits up, eyes wide in disbelief. “I wasn’t even invited to this party!”

“It’s the _graduation_ party, Jae. I don’t think you get a cream-colored invite for that. Come on. I'll buy you McDonald's everyday until your performance with He-Who-Shall-Not-Be-Named.”

"Anything from McDonalds? Even the double-Bulgogi burger?"

"Anything."

Jae groans, but reluctantly pulls on his hoodie. “Fine. Where is it? Are we going to have to drive?”

Bernard grins. “Walking distance. And don’t ask--you’ll have plenty of time to hate me once we get there.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Smut in the next chapter. Hopefully up by tomorrow if not--then Sunday or Monday.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Slightly shaking with a fluttering heart.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning for smut in this chapter. 
> 
> Twt - @teenuviel1227  
> Tmblr - teenie1227
> 
> Playlist: https://open.spotify.com/user/12159675821/playlist/1YX0i94BEtsZag1tnOrTHs

Jae makes a very solemn promise to kill Bernard, slowly--after a week of ordering whatever the most expensive thing on the McDonald’s menu is, of course. The house is a small, cramped duplex right off of campus, sandwiched between the University and the main road. Music is thumping through the entire house, some electropop keyboards gliding over a standard 808 (Wonpil’s doing, Jae guesses from how complex the keyboards are), playing loudest in the living room and spilling out onto the sidewalk. Jae’s never been but knows from Dowoon, with whom he’d taken Composition 101, who else lives in _that_ house.

Bernard has disappeared somewhere with Coco, last seen flirting in the kitchen, popping open two beers. Everyone is dancing or making out with someone or smoking something. Most of the people are from Music Production but Jae recognizes a couple of kids from Architecture, Fine Arts, Political Science, Creative Writing and even AB Psychology--he waves to Mark, claps Jimin on the shoulder, exchanges a couple of jokes with Taehyun, congratulating him on his latest EP which went viral online.

Now, he’s standing by the door, evicted from his corner of the couch by a too-handsy Wonpil and Sungjin, all giggly and obviously eager to get horizontal. Drink in hand, Jae takes a sip of whatever’s in the cup, feels the alcohol burn his throat but relax the rest of him as it courses through his body. He closes his eyes, tries to get into the music, the celebratory atmosphere.

So far so good, anyway--no sign of Brian. _A party pooper to the end, I guess._ Jae smiles and takes another swig.  

“Yo, Jae!” He turns to see Jackson heading in from the kitchen, a colorful bandana around his head, Namjoon in tow.

“Hey, Jackson. Joon.”

Namjoon nods to him, grinning, offers him a still-lit joint before blowing smoke up into the air. “Do you partake?”

 _Ah, what the hell it’s been a while._ Jae grins, takes the joint and holds the smoke in as long as he can before passing it back. “Thanks. Happy graduation to all of us.”

“Here, here,” Jackson laughs and takes a swig from his red cup, resting his head on Namjoon’s shoulder. “Can you believe I ended up dating a fuckin’ Philosophy major?”

“HAH,” Namjoon says, nipping at Jackson’s ear. “Can you believe I gave a Sports major the time of day?”

Jae shakes his head, takes the joint from Namjoon’s hand and takes another puff. “Mazel Tov, you two.”

He steps back as Jackson and Namjoon start to make out, Namjoon pushing Jackson against the wall. Namjoon pulls away long enough to hand Jae the spliff. “Keep it, my friend. Consider it a graduation gift.”

Jae’s phone vibrates in his pocket. He looks around for somewhere else to stand--his gaze lands on the narrow staircase. He takes them two steps at a time, sitting on the top step before pulling out his phone. Two notifications. _Huh._

 

 **YoungKDraws** (@itrytodrawsometimes) _Just Now_

You ever just really hate dance pop?

 

 **YoungKDraws** (@itrytodrawsometimes) _Just Now_

Sorry. It’s Friday night--you’re probably out. Sometimes I have to remind myself that people like that.

 

Jae grins and then pauses, a sudden thought occurring to him: same timezone, hating dance pop--the exact thing pulsing through the entire room at the moment, references to hating going out. He takes a thoughtful puff from the joint, letting the smoke stream out of his lips slowly. _Could it be? Could he be here?_ Jae cranes his neck, looks around for someone else on their phone, someone who isn’t sucking face or flirting or getting drunk or high or dancing or puking somewhere inappropriate or all of the above. Nope. _Planet Jae, population: 1._

He sighs, hits reply.

 

 **CutestChiquito** (@littlestchicken) _Just Now_

Depends on the dance pop, depends how you define out on a Friday night, depends how you define like.

 

 **YoungKDraws** (@itrytodrawsometimes) _Just Now_

Who’s being the smartass now?

 

 **CutestChiquito** (@littlestchicken) _Just Now_

Yo por supuesto

 

 **YoungKDraws** (@itrytodrawsometimes) _Just Now_

Estoy sorprendido! Are you Spanish, Chiquito?

 

 **CutestChiquito** (@littlestchicken) _Just Now_

Naw, I was just born in Argentina. I’m American. So that’s about all the Spanish I know, give or take. I know what you mean about dance pop though. I’ve got a friend who mixes the sickest dance pop keyboard tracks--so when it’s his stuff I don’t mind but it _can_ get super repetitive. As for being out on a Friday night, I’m at this party supporting my friend who’s about to ask this girl out--except, you know, I have no idea where he is which is probably a good thing. You bummed about something?

Also wait are YOU Spanish?

 

 **YoungKDraws** (@itrytodrawsometimes) _Just Now_

I am as Spanish as Google Translate will let me be.

And kinda. My friends dragged me to party--so to speak--but I’m in the mood to sulk and listen to sad songs so I’ve kinda holed up in one of the bedrooms. I should probably go out and be more supportive or something but I’m not quite as nice as you, it seems.

 

Jae finds his gaze travelling upward, toward the second floor with its two bedrooms and the one open bathroom people are lining up in front of. _He could be here. He could be any of these people._ One of the bedrooms has the lights off--but dim light slips out from the crack of the other bedroom, strains of The Cure’s Pictures of You with its melancholy guitar ringing out over the 80s style beat drifting out into the hallway.

 _No, it’s impossible._ Jae starts to stand up slowly. It could just be Dowoon--or even worse, it could be He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named, not at all elsewhere but plotting Jae’s demise or something. _But what if YoungK is here? What if he’s at this very same party, just sitting there, all lonely like me?_ He smiles fondly at the thought of finally meeting this person, this kind, thoughtful soul who’s been his anchor to sanity over the past few weeks, if not longer through his comics. The pot makes every beat of his racing heart pound with more emphasis. Maybe that would be worth whatever risk there is of embarrassing himself--anyway, what’s the worst that could happen? That he accidentally run into Brian? _You can’t upset someone who already hates your guts._

Jae steps slowly toward the door. The song inside shifts--a song that he recognizes, the gentle guitar and hand-claps over a mellow beat having filled his own room many a time. _And hey, if he likes Dr. Dog, that’s a plus._

 

And we’re slow to acknowledge the knots  
In our laces  
Heart it races  
And we go back to where we moved out  
To the places  
Heart it races

 

Slowly, Jae turns the knob and peeks into the room--and comes face to face with Brian Kang sitting on a swivel chair, a top hat on his head while he sings along to the song, a beer can in hand.

Boom-dadadadadada-boom-dadatdadat  
Boom-dadadadadada-boom-dadatdadat

“Oh freaking hell--jeez--I’m sorry,” Jae makes to turn around, gets his hoodie’s sleeve caught on the doorknob.

 

Brian startles, half falls off the chair, almost spills his beer but lifts the lip of the can long enough to slurp at the frothing foam. He licks his lips, clearing his throat as he downs more than he’d intended. The alcohol slows his ability to process what’s happening, it takes him a moment to realize who’s at his door: wide, bespectacled eyes, nervous, trembling lips, lanky frame, last seen quite angry, storming away from him. Before Brian knows what he’s doing, he’s hopped off the seat and let the chair clatter to the ground, reaching the doorway in time to replace the knob with his hand on Jae’s wrist, palm grazing the soft skin beneath his sweater. Racing pulse. _Or was that me?_

“Hey--hey, Jae wait--”

Jae sighs, turning toward him. “Look. Sorry. I didn’t know you were in there--I--I was looking for a friend.”

Brian tugs at his sleeve. “Yeah. Yeah, I figured. Anyway, I won’t keep you. I have something of yours. Gimme a few minutes. I won’t bite.”

Jae turns around, eyebrows furrowed, caught off guard. He frees himself from Brian’s grasp but reluctantly steps into the room, letting the door swing shut behind him with a definitive click.

Brian walks to his bag, pulls out Jae’s Bluetooth speaker: yellow, the chick it’s shaped to be smiling up at them. He hands it to Jae. Their fingertips brush against each other. Brian feels an odd tingling where skin meets skin. There’s a strange feeling in the pit of his stomach. _Must be the beer._

“You left it in the practice room.”

Jae tilts his head in curiousity. “Oh. Right. I’m surprised you didn’t burn it or something.”

It’s only then that Brian notices the burnt out spliff in Jae’s hand, the ash threatening to fall onto the carpet. He grins despite himself. “I didn’t know you were a stoner, Park.”

Jae looks down at his hand, bewildered. “Right. I forgot about that. I don’t smoke very often. But you know. Graduation.”

Brian nods to the trashcan by his dresser. Jae tosses the discarded joint in.

Jae is biting his lip, staring down at the speaker, unsure what to say. “So. You know. Um, thanks--for keeping the speaker. I like it a lot.”

“Yeah, sure. No problem.” Brian shifts his weight from one foot to another. He thinks about his conversation with CutestChiquito, how nice he’d been, how he’d gone to a party _for_ his friend. _How do you say sorry to your arch enemy? How do you start being nice to someone who hates you?_ “You want a beer?”

Jae looks up in surprise. “Um. Sure.”

Brian takes one from the mini fridge by his desk, hands it to Jae. Again, skin touching skin--this time cool from the beer can. Jae pops the can open, takes a swig.

“So,” Brian says, plopping down on one of the beds. “Where’s the great conversationalist Jae Park that people keep telling me about?”

Jae grins, leaning back against Brian’s desk. “I would’ve invited him but I’m not sure you can handle him, Mr. Kang.”

Brian lets out a laugh, downing the rest of his beer. “So how’re you finding the party? You try out the keg yet?”

Jae shakes his head. “It’s alright. I’m not really a party person. I’m more a play music then drink with friends at someone’s house after kinda guy--but it’s alright as far as parties go.”

“I’m sure you’ve experienced wilder back in the States?”

“I was never invited back in the states,” Jae says, taking another swig. “And I never would’ve gone. I only went because Bernard insisted--and why are _you_ up here? I’d expect you to be downstairs, trying to start a mosh pit or something.”

“You know me,” Brian says jokingly. “The life of the party when I’m not pooping on everyone’s parade. Can I be--honest for a while?”

Jae shrugs. “I don’t know why you’d assume you can’t be.”

Brian looks at the floor. “I didn’t mean to imply anything like that--I don’t know either, you know. I’m not sure why I say shit like that but yeah. I guess what I’m trying to say is that I’m sorry for what happened last Tuesday. I didn’t mean to be such an asshole about it, it’s just that--well, I’m not sure--”

“--it’s okay--” Jae interrupts.

“No, no it’s not. I know we’re both equally as upset about the whole thing. I know we both wanted the lead guitar performance--we just didn’t think we’d both get it--”

“--Brian?” Jae sits down on the bed beside him, holds his gaze. “Can I ask you a question?”

Brian feels his heart race at how close Jae is sitting. He can feel Jae’s sweater brushing against the skin of his arms, their knees almost touching.

“You already are.”

“Right. Why did you throw that soda in my face all those years ago? I was just trying to be nice, you know. I mean I’m sure you know--people don’t usually offer to help you move stuff out of spite,” Jae says, watching the way that Brian’s eyebrows furrow, the way that his lips press together as he gathers his words.  The light plays off of his cheekbones, the feline tilt of his eyes framed by dark lashes.

“Right off the deep end, huh,” Brian remarks. He reaches over, pops open another can of beer and takes a long drink before answering. “This is going to sound ridiculous and I swear to god that if you tell anyone--even Bernard, but especially any of my housemates, I will personally murder you and ship your body to Director Kim’s house--”

“Deal.”

“--I was homeless. I was living in my van because I’d gotten booted out of the dorms after telling on one of the upperclassmen. He was ‘outsourcing’ his Guitar Scale assignments to one of the freshmen in exchange of not being bullied. I told, he got expelled--but his dad’s one of the admin higher-ups and before I knew it, I lost my housing due to a “system glitch” that meant I had to look for somewhere else to live. He knew I was on the Star Scholarship program and that me losing housing would probably mean me having to forfeit. I’d rather die than let that happen so I lived in my van for a couple of weeks, showering at the Sports Complex, doing laundry at Dowoon’s. I got a part time job but they withhold your salary for two weeks when you’re new and it was a _long_ two weeks. I almost died of humiliation when I came over one day and was loading their washer with my shit and Sungjin talked to me about possibly sharing a room since Dowoon filled him in on my situation, they didn’t really mind having a third person to split with and Wonpil insisted on keeping his own place because he believed in ‘personal space’--which is complete bullshit, by the way, because he’s here like 25/7. I said yes and that I would of course, be paying my rent the minute my pay came in. So I was already kind of kicking myself inside for being a burden to my friends and for being an idealistic idiot whistle-blowing like that--and when you offered to help me, I just felt even more humiliated, if that makes sense? I know you probably didn’t mean to be patronizing but my pride just kind of fired off, tipped the scale--”

“--you mean the glass of soda,” Jae corrects him.

Brian smiles. “Right.”

“I’m sorry I made you feel that way,” Jae says. “I was just trying to make new friends and I heard you speaking in English and also I thought you looked pretty cool--”

“--shut up,” Brian says, hitting Jae upside the head.

“No it’s true! Your hair was dyed silvery blonde and you had that dangling earring thing and you were wearing a black leather jacket. I mean let’s be real. I’m the kid who got bullied all his life. If I hung out with you, I’d finally see what it was like living on the other side.”

“You’re insane,” Brian says, point-blank. “You’re the one everyone was talking about. The new hot shot from the states, so cool, so funny, always saying smart shit at a mile-a-minute speed, great voice, awesome at guitar--and they were right. I mean. They gave you lead guitar for a reason. And I won’t deny it. You’re something with the strings, Park.”

Jae feels his cheeks grow warm. “That’s only because you know how to play the bass and I don’t. It doesn’t mean--”

Brian is surprised at himself as he reaches over to tilt Jae’s chin up, meeting his gaze. His eyes are pretty behind their frames, twinkling, happy. “--don’t ever let anyone demean your guitar-playing. You won that fair and square.”

“But you kept contesting--” Jae starts to notice how close they are, the way that Brian’s calloused fingers feel against his skin, the way that he can almost feel the tip of Brian’s nose against his.

“--I’m an idiot.” Brian tries to keep his gaze level but finds it drifting lower, toward Jae’s nose, and lower still, realizing not for the first time if he’s being honest, that Jae has pretty eyes, the softest-looking lips.

“No,” Jae says, realizing what it is that he wants to do, feeling the desire curl and twist inside of him like a strip of dynamite on fire. _Has it always been there?_ “I’m the idiot--”

With that he moves forward tentatively, grazing Brian’s nose with his. He feels Brian tense, his heart pounding even faster when Brian doesn’t move away, when instead Brian tilts his head slightly, when their lips meet and they take a beat to meet each other's’ gaze before letting their eyes flutter shut, sighing into the kiss. Jae opens his mouth and lets Brian in. Brian feels the hair on the backs of his arms stand up--Jae is warm, Brian can taste the lingering flavor of beer on his tongue. Jae doesn’t expect to enjoy it so much but he does, finds his hands grasping at Brian’s shirt, holding him closer and closer still. Kissing Brian is like a song that he’s known forever but has only recently learned the words to--he can’t get enough. He’s soda and liquor, smoke and mint: bittersweet, good and bad, everything in this moment.

Jae slips his hands under Brian’s shirt, feeling the smooth expanse of his back, roaming the thin skin of ribs. Brian’s breath hitches, he sucks on Jae’s lower lip, lingering on the soft swell of flesh, wondering if it’ll be swollen in the morning, before moving his hands down from their perch on Jae’s nape down over his chest, lingering where he feels softness, thumbs working until he feels the skin pucker underneath. He pushes Jae onto the bed gently, pinning him down, slipping a thigh between Jae’s legs. Jae pulls on the collar of Brian’s shirt. The sudden movement startles them both but Jae proceeds, sucks a small bruise onto Brian’s neck, running his hands through Brian’s hair, enjoying the way that Brian’s voice is rough in his hear.

“Jae--”

"--Brian?"

They pull apart for a moment, both of them speechless, panting, watching the other, a little afraid but also eager. Jae looking up at Brian: illuminated by the dim light, honeyed skin aglow, a small smile on his lips, eyes bright. Brian looking down at Jae: eyes wide, lips slightly parted in bewilderment, kiss-swollen, his cheeks flushed--the entire moment, a question.

“You okay?”

Jae nods. “Yeah. You?”

“I’m okay.

“Okay.”

Slowly, Brian takes off Jae’s glasses, sets them down on the bed beside him before leaning back down to kiss him again, this time more sure, more certain, slower, deeper. Jae lets out a soft moan as he starts to move against Brian’s thigh. Brian feels Jae’s pulse racing, wonders if Jae can feel _his_ heart raging against his chest. Jae smells like vanilla shampoo.

Brian feels himself grow hard as Jae moves against him, the friction at once too much and not enough. He feels Jae’s desire mounting too as he starts to grind against him. He pulls away to kiss Jae’s ear, nipping at the shell, sucking at the lobe before kissing down his neck, his hands slipping under Jae’s sweater, tentatively circling the hollows of his hips.

“Brian,” Jae says, breathless. “Brian--what’re you doing?”

“I--” Brian sits up, pushing Jae’s sweater up, kissing the skin of his torso, enjoying the way that Jae’s back arches at his touch. “--thought that I would--”

He starts to palm Jae through his jeans, Jae letting out another one of those soft moans that are starting to sound like magic to Brian’s ears, his voice cracking. “Brian--oh jeez--”

“--make it up to you.” He undoes the button on Jae’s jeans. His voice is low, breathless too. “I mean. Only if you want me to, of course. If you don’t mind.”

“Um,” Jae says, propping himself up on his elbows, trying to pull himself together, trying to make a rational decision. _Who the hell am I kidding?_ “Yes.”

“Yes you mind or yes you don’t mind?”

“Uh,” Jae blinks down at him flustered. “The one where you blow me.”

Brian laughs--it rings loud and clear in the room. It makes Jae’s heart soar. “Park Jaehyung, the great conversationalist indeed.”

“The hype is real--”

Brian interrupts him by kissing the hollow of his hips. “Just tell me if you want to stop and we’ll stop.”

“With all due respect, Mr. Kang--I won’t want to stop.”

With one last mischievous smile, Brian shimmies Jae’s jeans and boxers down until they pool at his ankles. Softly, he kisses the insides of Jae’s thighs before slowly taking his already half-hard cock into his mouth--Jae lets out a moan as Brian’s lips part to let him in, the sudden heat and slide of him almost too much to bear. Brian goes slow, enjoying the way that his name--Brian, oh Brian--sounds on Jae’s lips, the way that he knows Jae is watching him. He looks up, takes in the way that Jae looks sitting on his bed, his oversized hoodie pooled up and around his waist, his cheeks red as Brian starts to go faster, closer, letting the tip of Jae’s cock hit the back of his throat until all that escapes his lips is gibberish, until he’s pulsing against him. When Brian feels Jae tense, feels his hands curl into fists around the bedsheets, he pushes Jae’s sweater up and off his torso before releasing him, Jae climaxing hot, pulsing onto his stomach.

“Oh my god,” Jae says, breathless, letting himself fall back onto the bed, trembling from the ecstasy.

Brian leans up to kiss him. Jae pulls him in, keeps a hand on his nape, hands grazing the soft hair there. Jae sighs against him, his arms coming to loop around Brian’s torso. When they pull apart, both of them are blushing, half from arousal, half from not knowing what to say.

“Tissue?” Brian asks, reaching for the box by his bedside table.

“Yeah, thanks,” Jae says, wiping himself off and pulling his boxers, his jeans back up. He puts his glasses back on.

He watches Brian as he sits back down on the bed, flicks open a pack of cigarettes, lights one for himself and offers one to Jae. Jae takes one, slips it gingerly between his lips. Menthols. Brian leans over, to light his cigarette. For a moment, both of them are illuminated by the flame.

“Thanks,” Jae says, blowing a small stream of smoke out through parted lips.

“I didn’t know you smoked.”

Jae grins. “I don’t.”

“Hey has anybody seen J--” The door swings open and they jump apart, Brian banging his knee on the end table, Jae singing his sweater with his cigarette.

It’s Bernard, standing at the door with his mouth agape. Jae’s eyes widen in horror as he watches Bernard take in the scene: the sheets on the bed mussed, Brian’s shirt wrinkled, Jae’s hoodie half-tucked into his jeans.  A slow grin spreads across his face.

“There you are, Jae,” Bernard says, his voice sing-song. “Hey, Brian.”

Brian stuffs his hands into his pockets, trying to look casual. Ash falls from his cigarette onto the carpet. “Hey, Bernard.”

“So I was gonna go home ‘cause Coco went ahead with Jennie, but if you want to stay--”

“No!” Brian and Jae say in unison.

“No, I’ll go home,” Jae says quickly, putting his cigarette out on the small ashtray by the desk.

“Yeah, okay,” Brian mumbles. “I should probably um, study the--the song too.”

They blink at each other, unsure how to say goodbye after what transpired--or how to part without either of them yelling or throwing a tantrum or saying anything mean. Brian goes in for a half-hug, Jae goes in for a high-five, ends up hitting Brian on the forehead as Brian kind-of-slaps his back.

“Ow.”

“Okay, anyway, bye and thanks see you next week!” Jae says, making for the door, pulling Bernard with him.

Bernard lets out a low whistle as they make their way down the narrow stairway.

“So was it just me or did that bruise on Brian’s neck look a lot like an open mouth?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I think I'm going to need more than seven chapters. :)


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hi, hello.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’m sure everyone’s seen this because, well, that’s how MyDays are made right? We direct them to this vid and they fall madly in love? HAHA That’s how it happened for me anyway. But just in case, this is the cover I’m referencing which obviously I couldn’t add to the playlist ‘cause it’s not on Spotify. 
> 
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PSrUHW74Yj8
> 
> Lyrics are from Day6’s “Hi Hello”
> 
> Twt - @teenuviel1227  
> Tmblr - teenie1227
> 
> Playlist: https://open.spotify.com/user/12159675821/playlist/1YX0i94BEtsZag1tnOrTHs

Episode 29 of Hi, Hello goes up that Sunday at 01:00 in the morning. No tweet, no announcement. Jae sees the post on his computer just as he’s about to head to bed after analyzing, re-analyzing, and re-over-analyzing the entire situation with Brian. _So he was there, I was there, and then we--what. Yo, but did we though? Did that happen? Or was there something in my drink?_ Even Bernard hadn’t been giving him a hard time about it. He needs evidence, proof that it happened--he also knows he isn’t likely to get it. He checks Brian’s Facebook profile for photos but aside the fact that (of course) they aren’t friends, there’s also the fact that they’d been in his room alone. So. Nothing.

Bernard is out on a date--with Coco, the party apparently having gone well--leaving Jae for once, not tucked under the duvet by 11:00 pm, but sitting at his desk, his Fender Coronado plugged into a mini amp, the volume turned down low, determined to turn heartache into something creative. He strums a couple of chords, records the melodies on his phone--but there are no words for what he wants to say yet, so he lays the guitar back in its case after a couple of tries. He’s about to turn his computer off but catches a glimpse of his Tumblr bookmark, remembers YoungK with a pang of guilt--he’d forgotten to reply.  He logs on, is surprised to find Episode 29 in its signature font, the first panel hovering above the _Read More_.

Jae clicks, starts reading.

The episode is surprisingly emotional after the action-packed episodes that lead up to the unmasking of La Bahista, longer, more immersive, going extensively into and out of Sej and Sunny’s histories. Sunny was born and raised somewhere full of sunshine and palm trees, the coast nearby--it reminds Jae of Los Angeles--before moving to the Big City (only ever called by that name in the comics). His childhood was full of novels and records, being bullied in highschool but finding redemption through art. He is meek but confident in himself, soft-spoken but makes a lot of friends.

In contrast, Sej is born in the Big City but moves up north into a cold, mountainous city during his teenage years. From the panel, the way it’s drawn, it reminds Jae very much of a postcard his aunt had sent him from High Park in Toronto when he was a kid. His childhood is relatively more easy going--except that he’s always known he wants to play guitar, isn’t sure where to start. His parents get upset when he says he wants to move back to the Big City. And when he gets there, he soon discovers things aren’t as easy as they seem. He has to work at a noodle shop where his hands grow veiny from the toils of kneading the dough and struggles to find a good place to rent, even with the bit of support his parents have lent him.

By the time the last few panels come around and they meet each other: immediately enamored, both slightly jealous of the other--Sunny of Sej’s grit and bravado, Sej of Sunny’s ease and charm--Jae is almost in tears. His favorite panel is the one showing both of them practicing in a side-by-side panel. Sunny’s is all vibrant colors as he plays a sparkling guitar, Sej’s is all dreamy, a storm of gray-and-silvers as he hits the bass, his old guitar hung up on the wall in his room. The episode ends with their first kiss, them sitting on the edge of a bed, staring at one another, each panel cutting closer and closer, mimicking how the characters inch toward each other until their lips meet.

 _Damn, son._ Jae wipes his nose on the sleeve of his sweater, hits the Direct Messages button. _I wonder if he’s awake._

 

 **CutestChiquito** (@littlestchicken) _Just Now_

Dude. Are you trying to freaking kill me?

 

 **YoungKDraws** (@itrytodrawsometimes) _Just Now_

That depends. Is it working?

 

 **CutestChiquito** (@littlestchicken) _Just Now_

To say the least. Dude I’m crying in my dorm room. What the feawh;roh;sdoifh;oawiehr;oihawr

 

 **YoungKDraws** (@itrytodrawsometimes) _Just Now_

Glad to be of service. ;)

 

 **CutestChiquito** (@littlestchicken) _Just Now_

Sorry I wasn’t able to reply properly the other day by the way.

 

 **YoungKDraws** (@itrytodrawsometimes) _Just Now_

It’s okay. Things got weird at the party I was at too.

 

 **CutestChiquito** (@littlestchicken) _Just Now_

HAHA You and I have more in common than I realize, then. What happened to you? Something happened to me too but you go first.

 

 **YoungKDraws** (@itrytodrawsometimes) _Just Now_

Ok, I know we’ve never really talked about this stuff but well, I’m gay.

 

 **CutestChiquito** (@littlestchicken) _Just Now_

Don’t take this the wrong way but the comics kinda gave you away a little bit, Señor YoungK.

 

 **YoungKDraws** (@itrytodrawsometimes) _Just Now_

HAHA Fair enough. Okay. Well. I kind of ended up kissing someone I like??!? It’s weird. I mean obviously I’ve kissed people before. But just. I wasn’t ready for it. It was overwhelming and I couldn’t stop drawing after. It’s so fucking cheesy and stereotypical but. I dunno. I liked it. I’m not sure if I’ll get a repeat. And that scares me.

 

 **CutestChiquito** (@littlestchicken) _Just Now_

Is that WEIRD? Isn’t that how things are supposed to happen? If you like someone, you’re supposed to like kissing them. That part where you’re all worried and stuff, that’s the exciting part isn’t it? You’ll probably get to kiss him again. If you think that’s weird, wait until you hear what happened to me.

 

 **YoungKDraws** (@itrytodrawsometimes) _Just Now_

You don’t know this guy though. I probably won’t. Nada chances, my friend. Outta my league.

 

 **CutestChiquito** (@littlestchicken) _Just Now_

Why? Is he blind? Has he not read your comics?

 

 **YoungKDraws** (@itrytodrawsometimes) _Just Now_

Flattery will get you everywhere, Chiquito. And well. God, I hope not. I’d fucking die. I dunno. Everyone wants him. He’s smart and talented and a fuckton of other things. Wait, wait wait. What happened to you? Why was it weird?

 

 **CutestChiquito** (@littlestchicken) _Just Now_

Dude, I ended up kissing someone I hate.

 

 **YoungKDraws** (@itrytodrawsometimes) _Just Now_

HAHAHAHA ah, yes. Hate. Hate is a strong word huh. How does that even go??

 

 **CutestChiquito** (@littlestchicken) _Just Now_

I don’t even know? ?? I keep thinking about it like. He was there. I was there. I thought he was going to kill me but instead he kissed me and I just ds;oifh;oiwehr;oih I just I dunno I’m not sure how to feel

 

 **YoungKDraws** (@itrytodrawsometimes) _Just Now_

Well, did you like it?

 

 **CutestChiquito** (@littlestchicken) _Just Now_

Yeah.

 

 **YoungKDraws** (@itrytodrawsometimes) _Just Now_

I guess you don’t hate him then?

 

 **CutestChiquito** (@littlestchicken) _Just Now_

Guess not. I want to though.

 

 **YoungKDraws** (@itrytodrawsometimes) _Just Now_

What? Why?? Curiouser and curiouser. You should change your display name to CuriousestChiquito.

 

 **CutestChiquito** (@littlestchicken) _Just Now_

Well. If you like someone, that makes you vulnerable. If you hate them, it’s simpler. I totally get you on the what-if-I-can’t-kiss-him-again thing though.

 

 **YoungKDraws** (@itrytodrawsometimes) _Just Now_

And I completely understand you on the vulnerability front. Not my strong suit, either.

  


Tuesday comes too quickly for Brian’s liking--when Jae had sent him the text that Sunday evening, things had seemed simple enough:

_Same room, same time?_

_Yeah, sure. See ya._

But when it finally comes down to it, Brian finds that he’s kind of a nervous wreck. Talking to CutestChiquito had calmed him down a bit, given him some confidence. Yeah, so turns out he found Park Jaehyung attractive. Yeah, so turns out he found him attractive enough to pin to the bed and then some--where does that leave him? _Hey, Jae. So you wanna get coffee? Fuck. Lame._

Today, he’s standing in his and Sungjin’s room, looking at himself in the mirror: leather jacket, powder-blue button-down tucked into ripped black jeans, earrings in, leather boots done up. He runs a hand through his dark hair. _Too floppy. Shouldn’t have washed it. And god, I should’ve kept the silver. Oh well._ He turns around, glances at his bed where a number of discarded shirts are scattered willy-nilly. He glances at his phone--8:45 am. He has to get going; he’s still got another stop to make. Haphazardly, he pulls the blanket over the bed, covering the mountain of clothes.

“Really?” He turns around, comes face-to-face with Sungjin. “You’re just going to hide that under there like that?”

“I’ve got practice--”

“--you’re going to practice like _that_?” Wonpil peers in through the doorway, giving Brian a once-over.

“What, a guy can’t dress up?” He grabs his things, makes to go down the stairs. “Anyway, I’m late.”

“Stay safe, lover boy!” Dowoon remarks, emerging from the kitchen with a bowl of cereal.

Brian wiggles his eyebrows, grins. “I have no idea what you’re talking about.”

Dowoon rolls his eyes, lowers his voice to a stage whisper. “I’m not deaf, you know. And the walls are thin.”

Brian feels a blush creep onto his cheeks, looks at Dowoon pointedly.. “Not a word or I’ll kick a hole in your floor toms, I swear.”

Dowoon’s eyes grow wide. He scoops a spoonful of cereal into his mouth, then makes a gesture like he’s zipping up his lips, throwing out the key.

  


When Jae gets there, the room is still empty. He swipes his student pass and turns the key. He pushes the heavy door open and flicks on the power, the studio lights warmer than he remembers. He starts to set up: chair, guitar plugged into the nearby amp--today, he’s decided to go without the distortion pedals, to play the electric clean. He’s thought a lot about this over the past few days, has come up with a couple of potential covers, still too nervous to think of anything original. He turns on the mic, taps it twice to make sure it’s working.

He glances at the clock. 09:00 am exactly. _He’s probably going to be late._ He glances at the reflective glass of the sound production booth. Today, he’s decided to keep it casual in a deep green hoodie--but also, he’d gotten his hair trimmed and colored over the weekend: platinum blonde undercut with the natural black. He takes a deep breath. _Okay. So._ He’d spent the weekend chatting with YoungK, asking for advice about how to get over awkwardness, how to just suck it up and say what the hell you mean--Young K’s words, not his. _Hey, Brian, what’s up? No, too forced. Yo, what’s gooooood? Damn it no, he’s not Bernard. Yo Bri-Bri! Ewww no._

The door swings open. Jae startles, turns around to see Brian standing in the doorway, looking, well, really good: the light catching the silver in his earring, slightly out of breath in a black, leather jacket with his guitar case (not the hard case for a change) slung over one shoulder, two coffees in a take-out tray in one hand.

“Hey."

“You’re one minute late.” _Smooth. Not at all like you were just sitting here, waiting for him all morning._

“Yeah, well. I had to make some stops. I didn’t know what you liked to drink so I just got you an iced latte and lots of sugar sachets,” Brian says, crossing the studio and offering one of the cups to him.

“Oh,” Jae says, taking it. He grins. “Thanks.”

“How was your weekend?” Brian asks, taking a sip from his own iced americano, sliding down onto the seat opposite Jae’s.

Jae feels his face grow warm. He grins, laughing a little. “Well. You know. I hooked up with this guy--”

Brian raises an eyebrow, lips lifting into a small smile. “--oh yeah, how’d that go?”

Jae shrugs. “A bit awkward--”

“--oh yeah--”

“--yeah,” Jae nods. “But good.”

Brian’s smile grows wider. “Oh yeah?”

“Yeah.” Jae sips at his iced latte. “You? Anything interesting happen?”

“Well. You know. There’s this guy I used to think I hated,” Brian says, frowning in play-seriousness.

“Oh, you _thought_ you hated, huh? How’s that work?”

“See, I thought I hated him because he’s this real smartass guy who’s always making weird comments. The kinda guy _everyone_ just loves you know? And he took my guitar away,” Brian says, waving a hand dismissively.

Jae lets out a small, shy laugh. “What an asshole, right?”

“Yeah,” Brian nods. “But turns out I hate him in a different way than I’d initially thought.”

“Oh yeah? How’s that?”

“Yeah I hate him because he’s kind of--”

“--perfect?” Jae grins smugly, wiggling his eyebrows.

“Hot?” Brian looks up at Jae from under thick lashes.

Jae’s feels a blush creep up onto his cheeks. He finishes off his latte, the sound of him swiftly sucking coffee in through the straw loud in the quiet room. “Oh.”

Brian shrugs, nonchalantly sets down his iced americano and starts to unpack his things. “Looks like we kinda both got lucky, huh.”

“Hmmm,” Jae assents, pulling his guitar up onto his lap. He watches Brian--the sure way he holds himself, the way that his eyes crinkle when he laughs. “Looks like we did.”

“So,” Brian says, unzipping his guitar case. Jae’s eyes grow wide as what he pulls out isn’t his stratocaster but his Ibanez SR300E bass guitar in Cosmo Black--sleek, shiny, glinting in the studio’s light as he hoists it onto his lap, plugging it into the amp. He grins at Jae’s bewildered expression. “Shall we begin?”  


 

It’s a little bit disconcerting, Brian thinks, how easily everything falls into place: sure, Jae had tried to pick a fight about him giving up lead guitar--he shouldn’t have to, the point of this was so they could both share in the limelight, he didn’t want him to do him any favors, he would step down. But Brian has made up his mind: if it meant playing better, then he would play bass.

“Don’t get me wrong,” he’d told Jae in an attempt to cut through the mounting tension in the room. “I’m still going to kick your ass at performing--but why not, right? If it makes better music.”

Jae smiled, then--the brightest smile that Brian has ever seen on a man. “Fine.”

Then he’d shown Brian a couple of suggestions, a couple of different ways that he thought they could start it off. “Maybe better to go with something semi-acoustic, something simple, a hook that’ll get people into the performance, you know?”

Brian had nodded. “What’d you have in mind?”

The song is an old one: the original version had colored many of Brian’s highschool escapades back in Canada, when he’d drive with his friends through the cold winter, dreaming of summer and sunshine and the ocean. But when Jae starts to sing, it colors the melody with a whole new quality--at once playful and melancholic, full of soul and playfulness. And as if the arrangement is one he’d written himself, it clicks: he knows where to harmonize, how to play the bassline--smooth, easy.

They pause after the first chorus. Jae clears his throat. “How about I take first, you take second? Then let’s just wing it from there?”

Brian furrows his eyebrows. “Or you could take the main on the verse and chorus, I could take the pre-chorus? I just have a hunch it’ll pan out better. ”

Jae shifts in his seat, nods. “Alright. We could do that. One, two--one, two, three--”

The guitar comes in soft, slow, Jae doing his signature thing: half-plucking the melody, half-strumming the rhythm. Brian plays the bass light, supplementing the melody with rhythm, going up on the down beat, a foot tapping against the hardwood floors. Jae glances up at him and smiles as he starts with a little improvisation--starting off with the little _hmmmmmm duroodut-doo_ before heading into the first verse.

 

Three little birds sat on my window.  
And they told me I don't need to worry.  
Summer came like cinnamon  
So sweet,  
Little girls double-dutch on the concrete.

 

Brian closes his eyes, lets Jae’s soft voice fill his ears, be the only sound in the room that guides the playing, like a compass to a sailing ship. He grins, hearing Jae’s little affectations on _birds_ , double- _dutch_.

Jae feels the hair on his nape bristle as Brian’s voice--that strong, smooth, powerful tone comes in for the pre-chorus, the perfect build-up--curls around every syllable, every lilting melody.

 

Maybe sometimes we've got it wrong, but it's alright  
The more things seem to change, the more they stay the same  
Oh, don't you hesitate.

 

Now, they’re both lost in the song--the melody and rhythm, the highs and lows, the ebb and flow of the tide of music. When the chorus hits, it’s like instinct: Jae singing the main melody, Brian hitting the higher notes with flawless falsetto, the little _wooh_ s and _babeh_ s supplementing everything just right.

 

Girl, put your records on, tell me your favourite song  
You go ahead, let your hair down  
Sapphire and faded jeans, I hope you get your dreams,  
Just go ahead, let your hair down.

 

“Cut to the bridge,” Jae says softly, glancing up at Brian, counting him into the arrangement. Jae grins. “Get it, Brian.”

Brian lets out a small laugh, playing them into the bridge.

 

'Twas more than I could take, pity for pity's sake  
Some nights kept me awake, I thought that I was stronger  
When you gonna realise, that you don't even have to try any longer?  
Do what you want to.

 

Jae sings the first half of the next chorus, both of them instinctively going higher on the second line, both of them showing off a little bit. Jae nods at Brian as they go into the second half-- _you take this one._ Brian takes it: his voice strong, powerful as it curves into a crescendo, Jae harmonizing but keeping it low, suave--a melody inversion.

By the time they finish, they’re both grinning at each other like idiots.

“Not bad, Park,” Brian says, trying--and failing--to bite back a smile.

Jae laughs. “Dude, did you just say _tell me your favorite jeans?_ ”

Brian throws one of his guitar picks at him. Jae dodges, laughing. “What does that even _mean_?”

“Levi’s, was it?” Brian asks jokingly. “If I remember correctly.”

Jae throws the guitar pick back at him. “Shut up.”

“Hey Jae?”

“Yeah?”

“What’re you doing after this?”

  


They really aren’t sure where to go--neither of them say it but both of them know that whatever it is they’re doing, it’s still too young, still too fragile to tell anyone about. They want to go somewhere private, somewhere none of their roommates or friends will see them and butt in, so they end up buying burgers for take out and sitting in the back of Brian’s van with the windows only slightly open. It’s currently empty of musical equipment for a change, has enough leg room so neither of them feels unpleasantly cramped. Brian has King Krule's _Ocean Bed_ playing softly through the sound system. Jae sits with his long legs folded under him, takes a sip of soda as he swallows his food. Brian leans back against the van’s wall, one leg stretched out long, the other bent, leaning against the back of the seat.

“I didn’t realize how hungry I was,” Jae says. “You know they say that your brain burns a lot of calories? That’s why after tests and shiz you’re always hungry.”

Brian shrugs, biting into his burger. “I guess that means I’m a genius or something. I’m always hungry.”

“Are you a cucumber kinda guy or a not cucumber kinda guy?”

“Cucumber, definitely.”

Jae makes a face. “No judgement.”

Brian throws a fry at him--but Jae catches it in time, grinning as he slips the sliver between his teeth and swallows. “Show-off.”

“So,” Jae says, finishing off his burger. “About last Friday.”

Brian nearly chokes. “Dude, right in front of my burger?”

Jae grins. “What? You bought, like, three burgers. If I wait until you’re done, we’ll be here all day.”

Brian rolls his eyes, sips noisily from his soda. “Fine. What about last Friday?”

“Well, I dunno,” Jae says, kind of nervous now. “Thoughts? Comments? Violent reactions?”

Brian wipes his mouth with tissue. “Hrrrm. A bit awkward--”

“--for sure,” Jae says, nodding.

“But like I said, good.”

“Elaborate, por favor.”

“What so you’re Spanish now?” Brian retorts.

Jae laughs. “Well I _was_ born in Argentina.”

Brian’s eyebrows furrow. _Naw, I was just born in Argentina._ “What?”

“I was born in Argentina,” Jae says nonchalantly. “Before my family moved to California. Anyway, explain, please.”

 _I’m American._ Brian frowns. _It can’t be._ He pushes the thought out of his mind--he would’ve said if he was Korean. Well, probably.

Jae waves a hand in his face. “Earth to Brian Kang. Please elaborate. What do you mean it was good?”

Brian shakes himself out of his trance, tries to focus on what Jae is asking him. He smiles, his heart fluttering a little as he sees the way that Jae is looking at him--a little afraid, a little expectant, as if trying to toe the line between saying what he wants and keeping face.

“I mean I liked kissing you. I think you’re hot, Park Jaehyung. I think we should do that again some time. Or times. Depending on what you feel like.”

“Ah, so like a--”

“--a thing where we maybe hang out at Itaewon after class next Friday, around seven in the evening? Dinner and drinks?”

Jae smiles. “Okay, I’ll try and pencil you in.”

The gesture is small but it’s what both of them remember later in the day: Brian puts a hand over Jae’s and keeps it there.


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> With a hello, you and I became a we.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the cover of “Shape of You” that I’m referencing here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=33rZYFmozjA
> 
> This is the “We All Try” cover I’m referencing during the YoungK / CutestChiquito chat: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0z8GNDhP4NE
> 
> Also, imagine they’d play Like That Sun in this rendition: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=usy7_j9qdQM
> 
> [mini-spoiler: the other boys eventually volunteer to help them out with background instrumentation for their performance]
> 
> The translation I used for Like That Sun is this: https://popgasa.com/2015/09/06/day6-like-that-sun-%EC%A0%80-%ED%83%9C%EC%96%91%EC%B2%98%EB%9F%BC/
> 
> Here is their Medley Playlist; I’ll (as per usual) update as we go: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLjos_4pdqvR_k_xuNcIhIwyA7Rn_HGjbj
> 
> Lyrics are from Day6’s “Hi Hello”
> 
> Twt - @teenuviel1227  
> Tmblr - teenie1227
> 
> Playlist: https://open.spotify.com/user/12159675821/playlist/1YX0i94BEtsZag1tnOrTHs

The guitar rings in the practice room--the slide slick, skin on metal on wood, as the chord progression goes: B Minor into E Minor, G, A. They’ve been playing the same song for the past hour and a half, but it always sounds new, fresh to Brian every round they play. He drops bass for a second to clap along to the bridge, the _come on be my baby, come on_ sounding like heaven to his ears as he and Jae’s voices slip together, blending like colors on a palette--Jae’s voice a high vibrant sunburst as it crests above the chorus’s upper notes, his own a calm aqua blue slipping right underneath, the resulting melody a sunrise. Brian picks up where he left off on the bass as they go through the last chorus, joining Jae for the final lines before slipping off into the smooth _ooh-ah ooh-ah ooh-ah ooh-ah_ preceding the outro.

“Awwwww yeah! AHHHH that was--like, I don’t even have words--” Jae does a little dance before he wipes his forehead on the face towel hanging from his shoulders, takes a swig from his mineral water bottle.

Brian grins. “How about incendiary?”

Jae narrows his eyes. “What you doin’ quoting Cameron Crowe at me? I already think you’re fine, Brian. You don’t need to impress me.”

Brian rolls his eyes but there’s a warm feeling in his chest--he likes the routine that they’ve settled into, likes the way that Jae always makes jokes of the things that he means, likes the way that these days a lot of those jokes were about him or liking him or thinking about him. He likes the way that he can say pretty much anything sardonic or kind of vague and Jae will figure out a way to piece together what it means. He also likes how for the past week or so, they’ve been playing side-by-side instead of across from each other, he loves the little intimacies: how sometimes they’ll be reviewing sheet music or listening to a couple of demos and Jae will absentmindedly put his arm around Brian’s shoulders, fingers tap-tap-tapping to the beat against his shoulder. Brian has wanted to kiss him or more since that first day they’d seen each other again after the graduation party--but he’s decided to save all that for Friday night. Work hard, play hard.

“So, you got any original bangers you’re thinking of using?” Jae rests a hand on Brian’s shoulder as he steadies himself to pull out his phone. He takes another sip of water from his mineral water bottle. Brian watches him--a sheen of sweat lending his cheeks a slight glow, his smile easy, relaxed.

Brian nods. “Of course. Who do you think you’re talking to? One of the Chainsmokers?”

Jae half-snorts his water, lets out a loud laugh, throwing his head back and leaning on Brian. “Dammmmmn son. You’re savageeeee.”

Brian lets out a chuckle as he pulls a crumpled notepad out of his pocket, flipping to the page filled to the margins with lyrics, notes, scratched out here and there, written over with fresher ink. He turns the page quickly, realizes there’s a small cartoon doodled into the corner.

“You actually use a notepad,” Jae says, watching him in bewilderment--Brian feels a wave of relief. _He didn’t see._ “A notepad with no lines.”

“Yeah,” Brian says. “I’m a pretty visual person so I find normal lines kind of obstructive. The blanker the canvas, the better the picture. I’d rather draw my own lines.”

Jae raises an eyebrow, smiling mischievously. “Briiiiiaaaaan. Do you _draw_?”

Brian feels panic rush through him. “No!”

“Methinks the Kang Younghyun doth protest too much,” Jae says, wiggling his eyebrows. “Show me sometime. Graphic novels--well, novels in general, are kind of my pastime.”

“How can I show you when I don’t draw?” Brian asks, half-smiling. “I can’t show you something that doesn’t exist.”

“Whatever. Who do you think you’re shitting--I’ve been your arch enemy long enough to know when something gets under your skin. You so _do_ draw. Look at your face: you do this weird squinty thing when you’re bothered. And unless by visual person you meant you know how to draw a G-Clef--newsflash, that’s everyone in our program--you drawing is all that makes sense,” Jae quips.

Brian rolls his eyes. “Maybe someday--we’ll know--when they find Amelia Earhart who holds the stars up in the sky--”

“--going from Cameron Crowe to Mandy Moore in less than ten minutes, diverse but it’s a slippery slope--”

“--the original is by The New Radicals, actually, excuse _you_ , Mr. California, I thought you’d know th--”

“--yes, I know that but we all know that our generation grew up on the A Walk To Remem--”

“--aww, a true romantic--”

“--I thought you would appreciate that--”

“--I thought you said I didn’t need to impress you--”

“--so onto the original song,” Jae says, changing the subject, hiking his glasses up the bridge of his nose.

Brian lets out a laugh before slipping his bass strap over his head and laying it on the floor, picking up his electric guitar. “Okay, so. I wrote out both a guitar line and a bassline--I’ll play the guitar first then you follow along, tell me how you like it, if there are changes you feel would improve it.”

Jae nods. “Let’s get it.”

“Okay,” Brian says, poising himself to play. “This one’s called Like That Sun. And it goes a little like--”

Jae’s heart starts to race as Brian starts to bring the notes on paper to life in the form of the sickest guitar licks. He starts to groove, tapping a foot against the floor Brian hits the metronome on his effects board, the beat playing steady as Brian starts to sing.

 

Every morning when I open my eyes  
The first thing that I think of  
The only thing in my mind  
Is you

 

Jae poises his hand over the guitar to play, joining Brian but turning on his distortion so that the melody comes out more electric, crisp under his hands. He grins, closing his eyes to groove to Brian’s singing.

 

When I’m looking at you  
When our eyes meet  
My face grows hot but  
Feels so nice

 

Brian nods at him. _Take the next lines._ Jae grins, adds in a little _dodododododo_ between the lines as he sings, adding a little _woo_ toward the end.

 

Dodododododo  
There isn’t a single day  
Dodododododo  
That I can live without you baby  
Dodododododo  
I’m waiting all night  
For the morning sun to rise  
My heart races at the thought of seeing you

 

As Jae sings, Brian nudges the sheet music closer toward him. Jae continues, Brian taking off his guitar, unplugging it in favor of the bass. He hits the first bassline right in time for the chorus. They grin at each other as Jae supplies a soft background melody--the softest _waaaa_ in the background.

 

So ecstatic  
When you quietly look at me  
I fall for you again  
Just looking at you  
Makes me feel good  
I wanna be with you forever  
Like that sun baby  
Melt my heart with a bright smile  
Like that sun baby  
Shine brightly into my day

 

The melody ends there but they keep going. _Improv,_ Jae mouths. Brian nods, playing the bass notes he’d written for the verse from memory. Brian grins as Jae comes in with some scatting instead of his standard singing.

 

I love every moment I’m with you  
When I said that, you said it was corny  
You pretend to hate it but you secretly like it  
I see it in your smile, too great  
Too Lifted  
I’ll end up like Icarus  
I wanna be by your side  
Even if I burn black  
I can’t help but to hold on, reason is  
Cause I’ll miss you  
Too damn much

 

They end there, both laughing by the time that the last guitar chord falls silent.

“I guess it’s safe to say you like it?” Brian remarks.

“Well, Captain Obvious--”

Brian tosses the notepad at Jae. “--write down the lyrics to all that stuff you just sang lest you forget, Mr. I-Reference-Greek-Myth-In-Rap.”

Jae shakes his head, catching the pad paper and pulling a pen out from his pocket, starts writing.

“You underestimate me, Mr. Kang.”

 

Director Kim frowns, re-crosses his legs. Brian and Jae sit in nervous silence, waiting for what he has to say. It’s Thursday morning, the first time that they’re showing him what they’ve worked on so far--arranging and rearranging their songs, so far they’d come up with around two minutes and thirty seconds of musical contents. Director Kim sighs again, eyebrows furrowed as he sits, seemingly deep in thought. Jae and Brian glance at each other. _Does he hate it? Do we have to start from scratch?_

“Younghyun,” he says. “Are you going to go with your stage name for your other proj--”

“--no! Please no,” Brian says, suddenly panicking. “No, I’ll just go with Kang Younghyun. Why do you ask, Director Kim?"

“The sound of that last track is very different than your other stuff. Of course you two know that the university films the final performance as well as all of your previous academic performances and showcases for your portfolio reels to help you once you start applying for jobs? That’s what I’m worried about. It’s a good progression but it might seem out of place. It’ll be good if you guys can work with stuff in the same line as Like That Sun but of course, diverse enough a range to showcase your talents,” he turns to Jae. “You wrote the rap parts?”

“How could you tell?” Jae asks, grinning.

“Only a smartass like you would reference Icarus in a song like that.”

Jae shrugs. “Yeah, I did. Was it too much?”

Director Kim waves a hand dismissively. “It was okay, perfectly fine, but like I said, a tad out of place given Brian’s history of writing melodic love songs and your love of hip-hop inspired pop. That’s all I’m worried about so far. You could, of course, also go down the diversity route and try and come up with as many little sub-genre circuits as possible but that’ll take a lot of work. You two already have a good groove going so I’d recommend the former.”

Brian nods, scribbles things down on his notebook.

“When’s our next meeting?”

“Two weeks,” Director Kim says. “Speaking of groove--I’m surprised you decided to give up lead guitar, Younghyun. I thought I was punishing you enough for being hard-headed by sticking you with the guy you threw a glass of cola at during the orientation four years ago.”

“Ah well it really wasn’t a big deal--” Jae starts.

He turns to Jae. “--and I thought I was punishing _you_ for being arrogant by sticking you with the guy who _threw_ the cola. How did that turn into this?”

“Well, Director Kim,” Brian says, unplugging his bass. “You know how in Casablanca at first you think Humphrey Bogart’s character is being unnecessarily mean--”

“--I can’t handle this right now,” Director Kim says, putting his signature shades and wide-brimmed hat back on, closing his notebook. “First Jaehyung with the Icarus, now you with the Casablanca. Between the two of you, we’ll end up with a medieval trap mash-up with reggae undertones--not that that wouldn’t be interesting. Anyway. I’ve got a busy schedule today. I’ll see you both in two weeks. Good job not killing each other.”

With that, Director Kim gives them a final nod and walks out of the practice room.

Jae meets Brian’s eye. “If only he knew right?”

Brian rolls his eyes but can’t stop smiling. He zips up his bass case, slings it over his shoulder. “I’ve got to go and do some things but I’ll see you tomorrow? Pick you up around 6:30 from your last class? For--well, you know.”

Brian puts his hands in his pockets. Jae smiles to himself, closing up his own guitar case. He walks toward Brian and leans in--gives him a small kiss on the cheek, light as a butterfly grazing a flower petal for the fraction of a moment. Brian’s stomach does a somersault.

Jae grins before pulling away and walking out the door.

“Yeah, I know. See you.”

 

 

The message pops up in Brian’s DMs as he’s doing research for the next installment of Hi, Hello. He’s looking up different photos of bass guitars, guitars, glasses, jackets, earrings--looking for a way to best represent Sej and Sunny coming to terms with who they really are through their character design. The message is a tiny envelope at the corner of his screen. He clicks it.

 

 **CutestChiquito** (@thelittlestchicken)

Dude, I’m so freaking nervous. I’m not one to curse a lot. But fuck. Sometimes. I just do stuff and I don’t even know what the hell I’m doing.

 **YoungKDraws** (@itrytodrawsometimes)

Ok, slow down. What happened?

 **CutestChiquito** (@thelittlestchicken)

So. Okay. So remember love-hate guy?

 **YoungKDraws** (@itrytodrawsometimes)

Why don’t you just name the guy? It’s not like I know him anyway.

 **CutestChiquito** (@thelittlestchicken)

It makes me too nervous to say his name err, write it. If my roommate sees, he’ll never let me live it down.

 **YoungKDraws** (@itrytodrawsometimes)

You’ve got it, you’ve got it bad--SING WITH ME

 **CutestChiquito** (@thelittlestchicken)

WOW I DIDN’T KNOW THAT THANKS FOR POINTING ITOUT

 **YoungKDraws** (@itrytodrawsometimes)

Ok, ok so why are you freaking out? What happened?

 **CutestChiquito** (@thelittlestchicken)

Well latest update: he asked me out on a date. I said yes. We’re going out tomorrow. And it’s so freaking weird. Like. I’ve always been the kind of guy who doesn’t really play games if he likes someone. Like. If I like you, I’ll probably confess so that we can just get all the awkwardness over with. But with him it’s like I do these stupid things. Mind game-y things. I make weird jokes. I KISSED HIM ON THE CHEEK TODAY. OUT OF THE BLUE. Who does that? BEFORE the date? With our thesis mentor still within earshot? Holy crap.

 

Brian raises an eyebrow, a slow grin starts to creep onto his face, his heart pounding in his chest _. I was born in Argentina_. What are the chances?

 

 **YoungKDraws** (@itrytodrawsometimes)

Oh yeah? What’re you guys doing? And if he asked you out, I’m sure he didn’t mind. Maybe it caught him off-guard. But I’m sure he wouldn’t mind you kissing him. For sure.

 **  
CutestChiquito** (@thelittlestchicken)

Out to dinner and drinks in the rainbow district of our city. It’s pretty cool there. I just kind of hope that we don’t run into a lot of our close friends.

 

Brian is grinning now, shakes his head a little. _You’re something else, Park Jaehyung. The littlest six-foot chicken I have ever met. And the cutest for sure._

 

 **YoungKDraws** (@itrytodrawsometimes)

Is this guy half-neanderthal or something? You ashamed, Chiquito?

 **CutestChiquito** (@thelittlestchicken)

I’m not ashamed at all. Forget coming out of the closet, I would burn it down, freaking claw my way out of it with a sledge hammer. Dude, you should see this guy. He’s hot. I’m not talking like kinda cute if you squint. I’m talking lit. I’m talking straight fire. I’m talking he could walk into GAP and they would mistake him for a poster. I’m talking Ralph Lauren, fire all your models. Last week he came to practice wearing this back leather jacket. Anyway. I’ll spare you the details. The point is, I’m just scared that it’ll freak him out. I didn’t even know he was gay until I was kissing him. People need to be ready at different times and I want to take it slow. As slow as you can take it with someone you hook up with at a party.

 **  
YoungKDraws** (@itrytodrawsometimes)

Trust me, I don’t think he’s freaked out.

 **  
CutestChiquito** (@thelittlestchicken)

I hope not. The last thing I’d want is to push someone into a situation they aren’t comfortable with. Did I ever mention that I’m Christian?

 

Brian furrows his eyebrows, trying to recall.

 

 **YoungKDraws** (@itrytodrawsometimes)

No you didn’t. And not to be offensive but that’s pretty rare, I’d say--a gay Christian who’s open to talking about it.

 **  
CutestChiquito** (@thelittlestchicken)

It shouldn’t be that rare, I think--love is love. My college entrance test was a cover of Frank Ocean’s We All Try. And there’s a line in that that goes “I believe that marriage isn’t between a man and a woman / but between love and love / And I believe you when you say you’ve lost all faith / But you must believe in something”.. And I choose to believe that everyone, no matter who you love, is a beautiful person who deserves to find love, to be loved, in the best capacity--whether that’s with other people or with themselves. I think a part of being someone who furthers that, or in my case, as a Christian who furthers love, is allowing people to feel safe in your presence. He means a lot to me--but I’d do that for anyone I was dating. I feel like it was careless of me to do that. I wanted to but I hope I didn’t embarrass him or make him feel unsafe.

 **  
YoungKDraws** (@itrytodrawsometimes)

I--I’m Agnostic myself and that’s the most beautiful thing I’ve ever heard. Also props on the Frank Ocean. I’m a huge fan of his body of work. Ummm. I’ve been in a similar situation before--where this guy I liked kissed me out of the blue within earshot of our Department Head and I didn’t mind. I don’t think he’ll mind but that he definitely appreciates that you took the time to think about that stuff. You should tell him on your date.

 **  
CutestChiquito** (@thelittlestchicken)

Dude, isn’t it too much for the first date? HEY by the way this is my life philosophy and the extent of my spirituality, how about another beer? I don’t think that’s how dates usually go, YoungK.

 **  
YoungKDraws** (@itrytodrawsometimes)

Well, to be fair, if this guy’s dating you, I don’t think he’s looking for a usual date.

 

Jae grins as he reads the reply. He thinks of Brian and the coming Friday, thinks of how happy he’s been the past few weeks--not that he’d been unhappy before then but that he’s felt the opposite of lonely: in surplus of gladness.

 

 **  
CutestChiquito** (@thelittlestchicken)

Touche. Maybe you’re right. I just don’t want to get burnt. I feel like I’ve found a partner in my music. It’s kind of like your comic. I’ve always identified with Sunny, you know? I’d like to think that finding out Sej was La Bahista, all he’d have on his mind is the hope that Sej doesn’t love him any less for being El Gitarista.

 **  
YoungKDraws** (@itrytodrawsometimes)

You know a lot of Greek mythology, Chiquito?

 **CutestChiquito** (@thelittlestchicken)

I do, as a matter of fact.

 **  
YoungKDraws** (@itrytodrawsometimes)

You know of Daedalus? Icarus’s father?

 

  
Jae raises an eyebrow. _Huh. Funny he should bring up Icarus. I was just thinking of that dude like, all week. Coincidink._

 

 **  
CutestChiquito** (@thelittlestchicken)

Yeah, the maze-maker.

 **  
YoungKDraws** (@itrytodrawsometimes)

Yup. The Labyrinth is genius not because it's complicated but cause the only way out is through. Goodluck tomorrow, I’m sure it’ll be fine.

 **  
CutestChiquito** (@thelittlestchicken)

Thanks, YoungK. That makes me feel a lot better. You’re seriously one of the coolest people I’ve ever met online.

 **  
YoungKDraws** (@itrytodrawsometimes)

Don’t sweat it. ;) And not to spoil, but I don’t think it spoils Sej’s opinion of Sunny that Sunny is El Gitarista. I think Sej would like Sunny even if he was supposed to hate him--because he has, if that makes sense. Trust me. Sej is too far gone to care if Sunny is his arch enemy. He thinks he's the hottest shit anyway.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Dateydates in the next one. Also I've decided, this'll be 10 chapters.


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> When I say this to you, it makes my heart beat.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Brian’s First Date playlist (I’m a sap, I know):
> 
> Here is their Medley Playlist; I’ll (as per usual) update as we go: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLjos_4pdqvR_k_xuNcIhIwyA7Rn_HGjbj
> 
>  
> 
> Lyrics are from Day6’s “Hi Hello”
> 
> Twt - @teenuviel1227  
> Tmblr - teenie1227
> 
> Fic Playlist: https://open.spotify.com/user/12159675821/playlist/1YX0i94BEtsZag1tnOrTHs

The signal lights go click-click-click as Brian pulls up to the Music Production building at 6:30 PM sharp. It’s Friday--it’s _finally_ Friday. He checks his reflection in the rearview mirror, ruffling his hair, which he’s had freshly dyed a silvery blonde, the sheen rivaling his hoop earrings. His flannel shirt is crisp, freshly ironed under his black leather jacket. He switches the playlist on his iPod--one labelled _Brian, You’re A Sap_ , his thumb hovering just above the play button as he glances up at the building entrance. His palms start to feel clammy with anticipation--he’s about to reach for another mint and double-check the route on his navigation app when then the doors open and Jae steps through them. Brian lets out a soft whistle.

He looks incredible: he’s wearing an oversized pale gray button-down with the sleeves cuffed up a quarter of the way, half-tucked into tight dark jeans ripped at the knees. He’s worn his dangling cross-shaped earring, Brian sees as Jae turns his head, a grin spreading across his face as he spots the van, starts to walk closer.

Brian hits play. The beat comes in and then acoustic guitar, the familiar melody jangly through the speakers.

 _Her name is Noelle  
_ _I had a dream about her_  
She rings my bell

Brian corrects the lyrics in his mind: _his name is Jaehyung, I have a dream about him, he rings my bell--_ Jae pulls the passenger door open, climbs in. Brian grins.

“Hey.”

The door shuts, the chorus comes on.

 _I’m just a teenage dirtbag, baby.  
_ _Listen to Iron Maiden baby with meee._  
ooh-ooh-oooooh-oooh

“Hey.”

Brian feels his cheeks heat up as he sees Jae giving him a once-over. “Jeez, stop staring.”

Jae grins. “Make me.”

Brian rolls his eyes but is grinning, can’t help staring at Jae either--the way that the light from the streetlamps come in , set off his hair, give him something of a halo, the way that the pale gray makes his skin look even more honeyed than usual, the way the slowly warming weather gives his cheeks a soft blush. With just a little bit of hesitation--that familiar tug of wondering whether or not something is okay, whether or not it’s alright to be himself--Brian leans across the gap between their seats and gives Jae a soft kiss on the cheek.

Jae’s cheek is warm against his lips. Jae bites back a smile. “Good one.”

Brian pulls away, puts on his seatbelt. Jae follows suit.

The song changes. Spanish guitar comes dancing through the airwaves.

 _Ay, Maria--when you were here before,  
_ _Couldn’t look you in the eye.  
_ _You’re just like an angel._  
Your skin makes me cry.

Jae lets out a laugh. “Dude, is this the Creep cover from The Book of Life?”

The chorus comes biting in, the strumming loud, the singing

Brian shrugs as they pull away from the curb. “Yeah.”

“Wheatus _and_ The Book of Life on the same playlist? What the hell.” Jae reaches for Brian’s iPod.

Brian panics, slaps his hand away as they exit the campus gates. “Hey! Don’t look at that!”

Jae grins mischievously. “Why? Did you make a special playlist for tonight? Tryin’ to romance me with music, Brian? Trying to set the mood before we even get there for an evening that I’m not likely to forg--?”

The intro from the next song comes in, cuts Jae off--swelling strings, a soaring melody, soft guitar.

 _All those days,  
__Watching from the windows.  
__All those  years,  
__Outside looking in,  
__All that time  
__Never even knowing,  
__Just how blind I’ve been._  

Brian smiles at Jae’s bewildered expression. 

 _Now, I’m here, blinking at the starlight.  
_ _Now I’m here, suddenly I see._

“Brian?”

“You were saying?”

“You’re a sap.”

 

The restaurant is on the second floor of a sky-blue building painted over with pink and purple stars. It’s a fusion restaurant that serves chipotle (both classic and spiced-up, with flavors ranging from garlic parmesan to yangnyum-infused) and specialty Sangria. Jae grins as they sit at one of the cozier nooks by the window, overlooking the main street--all of Itaewon lit up, the colorful lights going all the way down the sloping avenue.

Soft guitar music fills the air. The waiter brings out a pitcher of Sangria and pours them both a good helping, filling their goblets half-way. He lights the scented candles sitting in flower-shaped rose-colored candelabrum. It smells like rose-scented perfume and fresh fruits. They tell him their orders, he gives them a recap before heading back toward the counter.

“So,” Brian says, lifting his glass. “Here we are, huh.”

Jae wiggles his eyebrows. “Here we are. The last place on earth I thought I would ever be.”

“Itaewon?”

“A date with Brian Kang.”

Brian laughs. “Well, then. Here’s to music.”

Jae smiles shyly, looking up at Brian. “To music and good looking bassists, amirite?”

“You _know_ I’ll drink to that.” Brian laughs. “And to sexy guitarists.”

They clink their glasses together, take a sip. It’s sweet but the kick of the red wine is heady under the citrus. Jae feels the alcohol rush in through his system, making him a little bit lightheaded--but in a good way. He’s giddy.

“So. Are you gonna tell me when you started liking me or am I gonna have to become a fisher of men and lure it out of you with subtle hints?” Jae asks. _Am I being too forward?_

Brian rolls his eyes. “I already took the bait--swallowed it line and sinker. In case you didn’t notice, we’re sitting here in a candlelit restaurant for crying out loud.”

Jae grins. “So. Tell me yours, I’ll tell you mine.”

“Fine.” Brian takes a sip from his drink. “Well, obviously, it’s important to remember that all this while, I hated your guts--”

“--of course--”

“--but I always thought you were really effortlessly sexy. I’m sure you already know that it made me kind of mad just how sexy you were. I’d place it around 0.5 seconds before throwing soda in your face. It was something like _how dare you fucking patronize me oh my god he’s super cute holy fuck there goes the cola now I have to hate him for the sense of my ego and pride and holy crap all that comes out of my mouth are insults now I guess I’ll have to live with it._ ”

“Interesting.” Jae takes a sip from his glass, pinky up.

“And you, señor?”

“What’re you, like, Spanish now?”

“Well, I wouldn’t want to disappoint someone born in Argentina--” Brian lays the accent on thick.

“--well, I’ll have you know, that I always thought you were straight. Complete honesty, I thought you were the kind of guy who like, was way too stuck-up and knew that he was goodlooking? I mean, sure, everyone was talking about you being a good kisser--”

“--what? Like who?”

“Bernard.”

“WHAT?”

“He apparently heard from a bunch of people. Well anyway. I was like. Yeah. Kang Younghyun, your typical hottie who knows it. Good looking but a) out of my league and b) would never let me live anything down if I so much as stepped in his personal space.”

“Hey _you’re_ the one who kissed _me_ \--”

“--that’s relative. I touched your nose with mine, but you’re technically the one who kissed _me_.”

Jae grins.

Brian sighs. “Fine. I concede. Well. It worked out pretty good. Fortune favors the brave and all that.”

“Don’t quote Mraz at me.”

“Or you’ll do _what_?”

Just then, the waiter arrives, sets down to steaming plates of chicken chipotle down on the table. Jae’s gotten the classic carnitas platter, Brian’s opted for the shredded Yangnyum-black beans wrap with a side of chili.

“Hrrrrm.”

“What?”

“Is chipotle really the best choice for a first date?” Jae asks, raising an eyebrow.

Brian looks up, a little worried. Jae grins, takes in the crease that forms between Brian’s eyebrows when he’s serious about something.

“I thought chipotle was your _favorite_ thing in the world? That’s why I picked this place. I kept coming back to that time two years ago when the Music Production department did a dias de los muertos-themed Halloween party and you wouldn’t shut up about how _dude you can’t do me dirty like this, bringing Mexico into it without the chipotle._ ”

“Well. Yeah but like, the onions and stuff isn’t very practical for--other stuff--”

“--dude, they have knives here. It gets a bit messy but you can probably manage to--”

“--Brian. I’m talking about like. Sexy time. Getting the good stuff. Making out. You know, stuff like that.”

“Jeez.” Brian’s face turns crimson, the blush creeping up from his neck all the way until the tips of his ears. He slides a tentative hand across the table and intertwines his wider, more calloused fingers with Jae’s longer, softer ones. He uses his thumb to trace across Jae’s palm. “I’ve got mints in the van.”

 

The hill is up by one of the national parks, a shallower elevation than the rest of the hiking terrain but high enough to see the stars. They park in a spot clear enough not to be dangerous at night, but hidden enough not to be entirely visible from the main road. They’re both a little warm from the Sangria, the ride over a game of restraint and desire, Jae absentmindedly drawing circles on the insides of Brian’s wrist, Brian trying very hard not to crash the car. They'd both chewed a handful of mints each.

“Wow, Brian--classy. The back of your van, really?” Jae asks as Brian makes to open the van’s back door.

Brian looks at him pointedly. “Why do you make it so hard for a guy to be romantic? Now let me open the door because what I’ve got to do is pretty damn important.”

Jae rolls his eyes but relents, unable to deny that he’s curious at what Brian has in store. “Fine.”

“Close your eyes.”

“Okay, hold up--isn’t that a little bit too Beauty and the Beast--”

Brian reaches over and plucks Jae’s glasses off of the bridge of his nose.

“No fair.” Everything goes blurry--like watercolor, the dark landscape dotted with the glow from the city lights. Jae blinks. Brian grins. _He looks kinda cute like that._

“Just five seconds, I swear. And also, I kind of need you to make me a promise.”

“The level of commitment necessary to get in that van and kiss you--”

Brian lets out a chuckle. When he speaks his voice is softer, more gentle as he steers Jae toward the van door. “--just promise you won’t hate me. I didn’t know until a few days ago.”

“What’re you talking about?”

“Just trust me. Careful.” Brian puts a hand on the top of Jae’s head to shield him from hitting the frame as they duck into the back of the van. Jae blinks as his knees come flush with the padded floor. _Oh._ Brian’s laid down a kind of duvet. He looks up, dots of sparkling lights color his vision.

Brian replaces Jae’s glasses. Everything swims into focus, Jae’s mouth falling open slightly as he looks around him: Brian’s decorated the back of the van with small twinkling lights in warm blues, reds, yellows.

“Too Stranger Things?” Brian jokes, suddenly self-conscious.

Jae shakes his head. “No. Just strange enough.”

Brian smiles. “Good.”

Jae frowns. “Hold up. Why would I get mad at you for this? It’s really sweet.”

Brian takes a deep breath. “Not that. This.”

Slowly, he hands Jae a small booklet of paper. It feels smooth, heavy in Jae’s hands. His eyebrows knit together--he’d expected a kiss or some kind of sneaky, romantic thing, but not this. _What in the world?_ The images don’t register at first, the experience of knowing Brian completely different from his online world: it doesn’t quite click without the screen, without the usernames.

 

**_Hi, Hello Episode 30 by Kang Younghyun_ **

 

On the cover, El Gitarista is about to pull of his mask while a freshly-unmasked La Bahista sits slumped on the living room chair. The resolution to the big reveal.

“Brian--what are you--” The zine trembles in Jae’s hands.

Brian doesn’t answer, just types a message on his phone. In his pocket, Jae’s phone vibrates.

 

 **YoungKDraws** (@itrytodrawsometimes)

Hi, Cutest Chiquito. I think I’m going to have to stop chatting with you now.

 

A slow grin spreads across Jae’s face, his eyes going glassy with unshed tears. _It can’t be._

 

 **Cutest Chiquito** (@littlestchicken)

Oh yeah? Why’s that?

 

 **YoungKDraws** (@itrytodrawsometimes)

See, I like this guy. And I don’t think it’d be completely fair to him if I started dating him while kinda pegging affections onto this disembodied commenter.

 

 **Cutest Chiquito** (@littlestchicken)

Who’ll you go to for love advice though?

 

Brian rolls his eyes. Jae wiggles his eyebrows.

 

 **Cutest Chiquito** (@littlestchicken)

I mean obviously, I’m the best at it.

 

 **YoungKDraws** (@itrytodrawsometimes)

I’ll figure it out.

 

Jae scoots closer to Brian, putting the zine carefully aside. He pushes Brian’s hair away from his eyes, puts a hand gently on Brian’s nape. They study each other for the fraction of a moment: Brian watching the way that Jae’s eyes sparkle in the light, the way that his lips tremble slightly, the way that his hair falls softly into his eyes--Jae taking in everything that he can, trying to memorize Brian in this moment with his lashes casting shadows on his cheeks, the faintest traces of a smile still mapped across his face. _It’s like knowing the way home._

And then Brian leans in, pressing their lips together--the kiss is both soft and hungry, all tongue and teeth. Jae smiles against him. Brian tastes like all his favorite things--fruit and spice and mint. Brian pushes Jae back onto the duvet, pulling one of the small throw pillows he’d tossed back there and putting it under Jae’s head. Jae pulls him back down for another kiss, parting his lips to let Brian in. Brian lets himself press down on Jae, enjoying the way that his breath hitches as they move hip to hip, chest to chest, hearts beating fast against each other. Jae slips a hand under Brian’s shirt, pulling the hems out of his jeans and letting his hands explore--smooth, thin skin of his ribs, the plush expanse of his back.

“Jae--” Brian says softly as he moves to kiss the lobe of Jae’s ear.

Jae pulls away for a moment. “Look, Brian--we don’t have to do anything you aren’t ready for--”

Brian grins. “Okay.”

And with that, Brian leans back in to kiss him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Rather graphic smut in the next chapter.


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> We’re starting our own story.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Graphic smut in this chapter.**
> 
>  
> 
>  
> 
> Here is their Medley Playlist; I’ll (as per usual) update as we go: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLjos_4pdqvR_k_xuNcIhIwyA7Rn_HGjbj
> 
>  
> 
> Lyrics are from Day6’s “Hi Hello”
> 
> Twt - @teenuviel1227  
> Tmblr - teenie1227
> 
> Playlist: https://open.spotify.com/user/12159675821/playlist/1YX0i94BEtsZag1tnOrTHs

Jae kisses Brian slow, trying to hold back, to not do anything that neither of them are ready for despite the fact that their limbs are entangled, legs between legs--despite the fact that Brian has begin to move his hips in slow, torturous motions, despite the fact that Jae can feel himself getting hard, stiff and wanting against the fabric of his jeans. Brian lets Jae kiss him slow, enjoys the slide of their tongues, the way that Jae’s fingers comb through his hair, hold him down just tightly enough, despite the fact that both of them are sweaty, skin ablush from the alcohol and the arousal. Brian has half-unbuttoned Jae’s shirt, undone from the top five buttons down, hanging off of his shoulder--honey-milk, sunshine. Brian kisses Jae full on the mouth, letting his teeth drag along Jae’s bottom lip before he starts to go lower: lips grazing collarbones, chest, tongue circling the soft skin of his nipples until he’s satisfied, until they’re hard. Brian’s hands slide south under Jae’s shirt, thumbs slipping easy atop the hollows of his pelvis. He likes the soft, hoarse sound Jae makes in the back of his throat when he presses down, moves his hips again.

“Oh god,” Jae says, hands moving lower too, pulling at Brian’s shirt so that the friction is closer, bucking his hips up against him with more force. “Brian--”

Brian sucks a small bruise onto the thin skin of Jae’s ribs. Jae pulls him back up, back into a long kiss.

“You okay?” Brian asks.

“I--” The blush in Jae’s cheeks deepens. “Um--”

Brian smiles encouragingly, nudging Jae’s nose with his. “It’s okay. You can say what you say what you wanna do.”

Jae moves a slender hand down along Brian’s abdomen, skimming the space between his soaked-through shirt and his pubis. Brian meets his eye, lets out a sharp breath as Jae undoes the button on Brian’s jeans, slipping in through the denim to palm Brian through his boxers.

Jae grins, smug, lips grazing Brian’s ear. “You’re so hard--”

“--fuck,” Brian manages to get out as Jae uses his palm to move against the head of Brian’s cock. “Jae--oh my god--what are you--”

Jae slips his hand under the elastic of Brian’s boxers, enjoying the shudder that runs along Brian’s body as he swipes at the bead of precum with his thumb. Brian’s breathing comes out heavy, labored as he stiffens under Jae’s touch.

“Wait,” Brian says. “Wait, wait--um--okay so, mood-killer but how safe have you been?”

“Extremely,” Jae replies. “Like. Paranoidly.”

“Okay. Okay, same. Um. I have a proposition.”

Jae grins, winks as he draws small figure-eights along the dip of Brian’s pelvis. “What is it?”

“You’ll see.”

Brian sits up, pulls off his jeans, boxers. Jae slowly follows suit, blushing a little as he sees Brian watching him. He’s half-hard, his cock leaking a little onto his thigh. Brian maneuvers Jae so that he’s leaning back against the wall of the van, his head stopping short of the window, blonde hair illuminated by the moonlight.

“Close your legs a bit,” Brian says softly.

Jae obeys, watches as Brian climbs slowly onto his lap, bracing himself up against the wall with a hand against the window.

“What’re you doing?” Jae asks softly. “We don’t have any--”

“We’re not going to--”

“Okay. We’ll save that for next time.”

“For whenever we’re ready for that,” Brian grins, leaning down to kiss Jae softly. “Trust me.”

“Okay.”

Brian moves so that the undersides of their cocks are flush, and slowly, he begins to stroke, grins as he feels Jae grow hard against him, enjoying the electricity that runs down his spine as he feels the friction of his calloused hands make them both pulse against each other.

“Goddamn,” Jae says, leaning his head back against the van wall, exposing the hollow of his throat as he keeps a hand on Brian’s shoulder.

Brian strokes them slow but sure, his broad hands moving in motion with the way Jae is thrusting his hips---it’s too much, it’s not enough. They don’t say anything, Jae’s hoarse moans and Brian’s heavy breathing the only thing thing interrupting the sound of slicked skin against skin. The windows fog. Brian struggles to hold himself up, his hand sliding down the glass.

Jae’s feet tense. “Fuck, Brian--oh god, that's good--”

Brian goes faster, struggling to keep them both held, to maintain the pressure.

Jae slips his free hand around Brian’s to help him and they stroke fast, deep, close until they’re both throbbing, pulsing, right on the verge. Brian cums first, spurting hot and wet and thick. Jae gasps, using the hot fluid to go faster and faster until he climaxes, shuddering as he erupts over them both.

Brian collapses onto Jae, both of them warm, sweaty, a mess. Jae catches him, holding him in his arms a moment as they struggle to catch their breath.

Jae leans down to kiss Brian, pushes his hair away from his forehead. Brian hums softly, kisses Jae’s shoulder.

“Yo, Brian?”

“Mmm?”

“I mean, you _do_  have tissue right?”

“What do you think I _am_? Some kind of barbarian?”

Jae laughs. “Well, I mean--you just jerked us off on each other.”

Brian play-bites at Jae’s shoulder. “Excuse you. _We_ jerked us off on each other.”

  


The street is quiet as they park the car a little down the road, opting to walk the rest of the way, as the campus main gate is already closed. Jae grins as Brian walks him up to the small pedestrian entrance. They’re holding hands, both a little giddy from the way that their fingers intertwine, the way that their palms feel against each other: new, a little strange, but warm, safe. The air is cool against their still-flushed skin. Jae’s glasses are all fingerprints and dust. Brian laughs a little as he lets Jae’s hand go for a bit.

“So,” Jae says. The moonlight bears down bright on them, the nearby streetlamp a mere hint of an echo. It turns the whole night a kind of Danube-blue threaded with silver. Jae watches the way that Brian’s eyes crinkle as he tries to hold back a smile.

A car drives by in the distance. Brian kicks a stone into the gutter. It ricochets against a garbage can, the sound echoing in the blue night.

“Hrrrm?”

Jae grins. “Yeah so um--”

“You know you start like _every_ sentence with _so_?” Brian smiles, tugging at Jae’s belt loops, pulling him closer.

“So, Brian,” Jae says anyway, ignoring him, running his hands through Brian's silvery hair. “Thanks for tonight. I had fun. I don’t play games. I want to date you.”

Brian swallows. His heart pounds quick in his chest. “Damn--”

“--cut to the chase right? Senior year, why not? YO freaking LO.”

Brian lets out a laugh. “Looks like I’m really going to have to date a guy who says YOLO, then.”

Jae smiles.

Brian likes the way that it lights up his face, the way that his eyes brighten when they meet his. “Goodnight, then, Cutest Chiquito.”

Jae puts his arms around Brian. Brian hums against him, tucks a piece of Jae’s hair behind his ear. Jae leans down to kiss him soft, sweet.

“Goodnight, Young K.”  


 

“Holy shit,” Sungjin says from the driver’s seat of Wonpil’s car just as Wonpil is about to lean back in for a kiss.

They’re parked about a block away from campus, right where the turn goes toward school, a thicket of trees casting shadows onto the road--a blindspot for both CCTV cameras, security. Wonpil had promised he’d sleep at his place on campus tonight for a change--they’d made it halfway there before Sungjin convinced him otherwise. Sungjin sits up, pulls down his shirt. Wonpil puts his hands on Sungjin’s shoulders to steady himself from the motion, cranes his neck to see what’s happening.

“What’s wrong, baby--”

“Oh my god,” Sungjin says again, leaning closer to the tinted, fogging window. “OH MY GOD--”

“What is it?” Wonpil says, trying to peer through the glass.

Hurriedly, Sungjin reaches over toward the passenger’s seat, plucking Wonpil’s glasses and settling them on his nose. He grins, always finds Wonpil cute with glasses on, his eyes tiny under the thick lenses.

“LOOK.”

“OH MY GOD!” Wonpil exclaims too as he sees what Sungjin saw. “Oh my god my god my god!”

This is what they see: Brian’s car pulls up over by the corner. Brian gets out of the driver’s seat--but it’s what comes next that renders them both speechless. The passenger door opens out steps Park Jaehyung: tall, lanky frame silhouetted by the moonlight, his bright blonde hair and round, metallic glasses unmistakable.

“Isn’t it a bit--late?” Wonpil asks. “I mean. It’s past midnight.”

“Maybe they came from a gig,” Sungjin offers. "Maybe it's a final presentation thing."

“Where’s Jaehyung’s guitar?”

“No, to watch.”

“Where’s Brian’s camera?”

“Good point.”

“OH MY GOD!” This time it’s Wonpil’s turn to yell.

Sungjin’s eyes grow wide as they watch the two figures in the moonlight walk toward campus, slowly moving closer and closer together--and then the one, sure motion: Brian slips his hand into Jae’s, their fingers interlacing. Jae nips at Brian’s ear, laughing.

Sungjin and Wonpil look at each other in disbelief.

“Dowoon is never going to believe us.”


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> We’re starting our own story.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’ve laid everything out--this might end up becoming 12 chapters long because there’s still so much to cover, but we shall see!
> 
> Here is their Medley Playlist; I’ll (as per usual) update as we go: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLjos_4pdqvR_k_xuNcIhIwyA7Rn_HGjbj
> 
>  
> 
> Lyrics are from Day6’s “Hi Hello”
> 
> Twt - @teenuviel1227  
> Tmblr - teenie1227
> 
> Playlist: https://open.spotify.com/user/12159675821/playlist/1YX0i94BEtsZag1tnOrTHs

Brian wakes up slowly the next day, feeling light as a feather. He pulls the sheets over his head, pulling his pillow in tighter, unable to stop smiling. _I went out with Jae Park. No--I’m dating Jae Park. Park Jaehyung._ He closes his eyes, grinning into the soft fabric of his pillow. He remembers the way that Jae had smiled down at him before they’d parted the night before, the way that the entire night had gone: the way Jae looked when he’d taken the comic from Brian, the sudden realization about what he was trying to say settling on his face like milk seeps into coffee--a swirl of emotion. Brian kicks at the sheets in excitement, suddenly giddy for the weeks to come, suddenly excited to write more music, to head to practice, a billion songs and melodies and arrangements flooding his mind.

“Jeezus, Brian. Are you humping your pillow?”

Brian jumps, kicking the covers off and nearly falling off the bed. Sungjin and Wonpil are standing by the doorway, grinning.

“No! What the hell. What’re you guys doing? Christ. You two should start a private investigation business, you’re so quiet.”

“I live here?” Sungjin says, laughing a little.

Brian rolls his eyes, sitting up. “No I mean what are you guys doing, lurking by the doorway like that?”

Wonpil lets out a giggle. Sungjin nudges him. “We cooked breakfast for everyone. So you should come down. Let’s all have breakfast together.”

Brian frowns but gets out of bed, his stomach grumbling. “Did Wonpil cook? Cause pancakes aren’t supposed to be salty. Not the kind that you eat with butter and syrup anyway.”

Wonpil lets out a laugh, throwing his head back dramatically. “Don’t worry, Brian. We have a lot to say about sweetness--”

“--what?” Brian’s eyebrows knit together as he passes them by the doorway. “I swear to god someone needs to invent some kind of linguistics rubric for you two. I have no idea what you’re saying half the time.”

“You know,” Sungjin adds. “Sweetness and honey and sugar and stuff like that.”

“Are you two high? It’s barely ten o’clock.”

Wonpil claps Brian on the shoulder, steers him toward the kitchen.

“HAH! You wish.”

  


Jae wakes up energized, fully awake, sits up immediately. He glances at the clock. It’s barely nine o’clock. He stubs his toe on the corner of his bed on the way to the bathroom. _Damn it._ It hurts. Jae grins. _It wasn’t a dream. Holy crap, it wasn’t a dream! Brian is Young K and he drew me a comic and we ate Chipotle and holy fuck--I mean, frack--we did the stuff in his car._

“Bernie!” He trots over to where Bernard is sitting at his desk, playing videogames on his laptop. He half-pounces on Bernard and pretends to be one of the zombies in the game, trying to bite him. Bernard whirls around, startled, and ends up hitting Jae square in the jaw.

“Ow! Jeez!”

“Holy crap, sorry Jae!” Bernard bursts out laughing.

Jae rubs his cheek--a bit sore but nothing _too_ serious. “S’fine. So what are you doing on this beautiful, fine day? Have you eaten, my friend? Le Chef Eaj is going to be making some fine grilled cheese sammiches and brewing some good old americanooo or well, the grinds are for an espresso machine but you know how it is. I don’t have one of those so it’s just gonna be brewed coffee. Breakfast the magnifico way. By which I mean, I’mma toast it all. And the coffee might be kinda burned. Do you want to partake?”

Bernard looks at him deadpan. “Do you even have to _ask_? I’m starving.”

“Why didn’t you order food? Or make some?”

Bernard shrugs. “I was gaming. I wanted to the get to the next level and was using my hunger to fuel my abilities.”

Jae walks into their small kitchen area, starts to lay bread out onto a plate, lay  it over with thin slices of cheddar and mozzarella. Bernard follows, leans against the fridge.

“Dude, you’re supposed to butter the toast and then lay on the cheese. So it makes that crust thing after you take it out of the toaster oven.”

Jae holds up a hand. “Shhh. Don’t interrupt the genius at work.”

He tosses a couple of slices on top of each other. The edges don’t quite lay flat, a corner of cheddar droops over the side of the bread.

“Please fix that.”

“Perfecto. It’s chaos and harmony, it’s balance interrupted. All things in their--”

“--it’s going to be a bitch to clean that damn toaster after.”

Jae moves the cheese back onto the bread. “Fine.”

Bernard plucks a square sheet of cheese from the surplus of slices that Jae’s cut, folds it in half before putting it in his mouth. “Okay, so. Where’d you go last night? I didn’t hear you get home. I was so damn tired from basketball.”

Jae grins. “Itaewon.”

“Solo samgyupsal nights or--not-so-solo not-so-samgyupsal nights?”

Jae slips the slices of cheese-on-bread into the oven toaster, turns the dial. He turns to Bernard, wiggles his eyebrows. “Not-so-solo, homieee. Not-so-solo.”

“Oooooh, look at you, Mr. Suave,” Bernard grins as he hands Jae the bag of coffee grinds. “Who was the hot date?”

"It's Sua-ve if you're from Argentina."

Bernard rolls his eyes. "So, spill the beans, Chef Aej."

Jae scoops the grinds into the filter, pours water into the liquid cartridge, clicks it into place, and hits the red button. The coffeemaker starts to hiss. “You wouldn’t believe me if I told you.”

Bernard snorts. “Why? Is it Brian?”

Jae grins, doesn’t say anything, only pulls out two cups off of the dishrack.

Bernard’s eyes grow wide. “Wait. What? Is it Brian? Did you go out on a date with Brian?”

Jae clicks his tongue, winks at Bernard. “I’m not saying it’s an enemies to lovers romcom that airs on Netflix with two ridiculously good looking protagonists but that’s exactly what I’m saying. They’ve gotten together, my friend. The central conceit has fallen through, all the cards are on the table. I’m saying a Mr. Brian Kang took one very handsome Jaehyung Park to a Chipotle restaurant and it was good. It was real good.”

Bernard blinks. “What the hell--”

“--dude, I thought you were the one saying there’s only one way that this could end or something like that.”

“Yeah but I didn’t think it would actually _happen_.”

“Well. I gotchu, Bernie. I got this, Nakjie. That’s what happens when you make the impossible happen. Beautiful possibilities are born! You make beautiful music with someone you find beautiful! It’s all beautiful--”

“--I hate lovesick Jae--”

“--and you wake up like you’ve already had coffee, like it’s infused into your bloodstream, like---”

“--the bread is burning--”

“--shhhhh, Nakjie. Shhhh.” Jae turns the dial until it dings. He opens the toaster compartment a little, letting some steam out. “You shouldn’t hinder the musings of a true poet, a connoisseur with words, a true artiste in the midst of--”

“--could the true artiste make the sandwiches and feed his hungry roommate while telling him the story of who what how why when this whole thing happened with his previously sworn enemy?”

Jae drops the hot pieces of bread onto two separate plates hapazardly, blowing on his hands between slices to cool them. “Yes. Yes he will, Bernard. But you can’t rush art. We’ve just gotten to the intro, we gotta have coffee for the backstory. It’s lit, it’s wonderful, it’s got it’s own webcomic.”

Bernard sighs. “Oh god, the webcomics. Lord help me.”

 

 

Brian frowns into his plate of pancakes. It’s all perfectly plated, with whipped cream and fresh strawberries and almond slivers. Dowoon is sitting bleary-eyed across from him. Sungjin and Wonpil are sitting, smiling as they pass him the syrup.

“What the hell is going on? You two are scaring me.” Brian says, drizzling syrup onto his plate.

“Maybe they’re getting married,” Dowoon says, shrugging and cutting into his pancakes haphazardly. “Thanks for the pancakes, lovebirds. Okay, I’ll be your cool bestman and play drums at the wedding.”

Wonpil turns as pink as his sweater. “What! No! That’s not--”

Sungjin grins. “--not that we’d discount it in the future--”

“--right,” Wonpil says, smiling shyly. “But this isn’t about that. We just think that honesty is a very important thing in this household.”

Brian furrows his eyebrows. “Your name isn’t even on the lease.”

“It’s called _de facto_ ,” Sungjin says. “Anyway--”

“--are we getting evicted?” Dowoon stuffs a pancake slice in his mouth. “Cause I can’t move the drumset until next month. I lost my drum key and don’t have enough money to buy a new one.”

“As I was saying,” Wonpil says, recovering his composure. “Honesty is very important and so we would like to take this opportunity to give Brian the opportunity to tell us where he was last night at say, 12:45 am?”

Brian drops his knife with a clatter. “None of your business!”

Wonpil grins. “You know the blind curve right off of the main gate?”

Blood drains from Brian’s face. “Shut up.”

Sungjin stands up to hug Brian’s head and ruffle his hair with his knuckles. “You know how if you park under the big Acacia tree no one really sees the car because it’s dark but because it’s dark you can see outside--”

Brian struggles in Sungjin’s grip. “--Dowoonie, remember that bet we took in second year right after the big soda showdown?”

“You guys bet!?!??!” Brian reaches over to pinch Sungjin. Sungjin jolts, releasing him. “On what?”

Dowoon grins, nodding. “Ah, yeah. They’re dating.”

Wonpil’s jaw drops. “You _knew_?”

“HAH!” Brian says, pointing a whipped-cream covered fork at Wonpil. “HAHA! Joke’s on you he already _knew_.”

“See? We really need an honesty policy in this house--”

“--not to get all Mean Girls on you Wonpillie but you don’t even go here--”

“--don’t talk to him like that--”

“--what were you guys doing in a car at that time parked in that place anyway--”

“--you _really_ don’t want to know--”

“--jeez eww fuck--”

“--weeeellll--”

“--so, Brian,” Dowoon says, looking up from his plate, a small grin slowly spreading across his face. “Do you guys have a couple name yet? There’s a 20,000-won sale on couple sweaters in the subway, they custom-embroider.”

  


“Get this, it’s Jae-hyung-park-ian,” Jae says, taking a swig of his coffee. “I thought of it myself, thank you very much. Came to me in a dream, like every other good idea that every lonely fanfic-author-cum-bestselling-novelist has never had. It’s unconventional but it’s got a good rhythm.”

Bernard almost snorts his coffee through his nose. “Brian’s never going to buy that, man. He’s not gonna have it. I took Comp with him before I shifted and that guy s going to become, like, the next Jay-Z.”

“Dude, he will. Because this is what I’m going to tell you about Brian. He’s got good taste--he knows what’s good. And personally, I take that Jay-Z thing as a compliment. Cause that means I would be BEYONCE. That's lit. I mean. He's perfect. He'll love it. He wrote me a damn comic. The webcomic, Bernard. Aren't you going to react about destiny?"

"Well, it would be fitting. If you're Beyonce, this relationship is Destiny's Child."

"Oh god. I think a part of me always knew. I mean we'd chat and I would just feel so at ease? Like I knew him? What a perfect love story. Dude, Nicholas Sparks has to get in on this. Forget The Notebook. This is where it's at."

Bernard bursts out laughing. “That’s a far cry from _he’s so mean, Bernard. I hate him, Bernard. He’s just always out for blood. I would rather die. I’d rather go and swim in a half-frozen lake wearing denims and nothing else in the dead of winter because anything is better than having to sit in a practice room with Kang freaking Younghyun for hours on end._ ”

Jae scoffs, stuffing the rest of his sandwich into his mouth, using his free hand to wave dismissively at Bernard. “Okay, okay fair enough. But you had to know it was endgame from the start right? I mean. That’s a pretty damn good story. How many people fall in love having soda thrown in their face? No one but your boy right here. Jaehyungparkian’s where it’s at, Bernard. Tell all your friends. It’s gon’ be heat.”

“Oh don’t worry,” Bernard says. “I’m going to tell all my friends and you’re never going to live it down.”

Jae lets out a laugh. “Bring it. Pro-tip, my friend: it’s not teasing if you like ittttt.”


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I stood in front of you, carefully said these words.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, 12 chapters. 
> 
> Here is their Medley Playlist; I’ll (as per usual) update as we go: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLjos_4pdqvR_k_xuNcIhIwyA7Rn_HGjbj
> 
>  
> 
> Lyrics are from Day6’s “Hi Hello”  
> English translation for “Eyeless” is this one by jaelavie on Twitter: https://twitter.com/jaelavie/status/837731717448249344?lang=en
> 
> WYD, I Loved You and Blood translations were from colorcodedlyrics.com
> 
> Twt - @teenuviel1227  
> Tmblr - teenie1227
> 
> Playlist: https://open.spotify.com/user/12159675821/playlist/1YX0i94BEtsZag1tnOrTHs

The next few weeks fly by in a flurry of music, movies, guitar riffs, bass licks, melody and rhythm, hands held, steamy nights with bodies moving against each other in the back of Brian’s van--skin against skin against leather, each time coming close to that final step but never crossing the line--which is fine, as far as Brian is concerned: as long as Jae keeps smiling at him like that, keeps looking at him the way he looks at him. Because right now, there’s this, right now as they’re sitting in the practice room with most of their final routine planned out--right now, they’re playing through one of their favorite songs, both original and borrowed, re-arranged, Jae grinning at him as they hit the bridge. 

“Get your body movin’ like this--bass,” Jae says into the mic, dropping his guitar to hold the mic up to his lips.

Brian hits the bass solo, closing his eyes for a moment, loving that drop in the main melody, loves how they transition into one another, how it all goes together. 

“Don’t even trip, boy, ‘cause we takin’ it back to basics--cruise slow, good times, good boys, man--” 

He watches Jae get through the rap part, ready for them to get back into the main melody.  _ Fuck, he’s hot when he raps.  _ They grin at each other as they play the last notes, melt into the next song out of habit, Jae plucking the guitar close and slow, Brian letting the bass go loose, low, thrumming. Brian enjoys the way that Jae’s sneakers tap to the same rhythm as his boots--the way that their voices join up on the pre-chorus before Jae pushes them into the chorus. 

__ Oh, you’ve gotta see blood, girl,  
You’ve gotta see blood girl,  
You’re only satisfied when you see blood. 

Brian takes the rap part from there, the second verse a stark contrast to the first. Jae closes his eyes now, grinning, grooving to the sound of Brian’s voice against the playful guitar melody.  _ Fuck, he’s so hot when he raps--or sings, or plays bass, or does anything, really.  _ He tries not to play the wrong chords, tries not to get distracted by the thought of Brian’s hands, the way they pluck at the bass, the way that his thumb had felt against Jae’s--they kick back into the final chorus, this time both of them singing in unison, Jae taking the lower melody, Brian’s voice doing vocal somersaults as they dive into the next song, a cut from a cover of one of their favorite local groups: a short intro, more of a bridge or interlude than anything else. 

Jae steps on his distortion pedal, taking all of the crunch out of the sound, playing it clean, almost-acoustic. Brian starts to sing, eyes closed, lips brushing the mic ever-so-slightly. Jae wonders if there is any other instance in which he’s wished he were a mic. 

__ What you doing today? Oh, oh  
What you doing tomorrow? Oh, oh  
I want to see you--’cause I’m lonely. 

Jae clears his throat, gets ready for the improv. He feels Brian’s eyes on him. His cheeks start to burn. They’d practiced this bit the other day, had ended up pressed against the frame of Jae’s bed, Brian’s hands under Jae’s sweater, his acoustic guitar lying on the floor, mostly forgotten.

__I swear, that we were good  
Two weeks on the heat,  
I thought we were good,  
I’m sure it wasn’t just something that happened  
Cause you were bored  
And I was lonely  
I’m waitin’ for your  
One-word reply  
To me, oh

Brian sings the verse, voice going in leaps and bounds--graceful until he jumps over the edge on the last line, Jae taking over the singing, soft, his voice barely a sigh. They grin at each other, both of them singing the last chorus, Jae’s voice high this time, Brian taking the bass melody. 

__I swear, I swear  
(Cause I’m lonely, oh oh--)  
I swear, I swear, it’s not just cause you were bored and I was lonely  
(Oh baby,  was lonely)

From there, Jae kicks it into the chorus of a song they’d written for the medley, something not-quite-finished but which they were both attached to, both know that they want it in no matter what. They didn’t have much: just a chorus, some verse bits. 

__Without you, I’m eyeless  
My day is sightless,  
Even if I wanted to see,  
Nothing is visible

Brian takes a deep breath, starts to sing his part. 

__Without you, I”m speechless  
All day long, silence  
Even if I wanted to say something, I can’t make a sound  
I just wanna be with you

They take the last chorus, singing it on twice, trading melodies, enjoying the motion of one going higher, the other swooping lower, meeting in the middle. It’s Brian that leads them into the last track: a ballad, unexpected from them both, their voices a perfect fit, snug against one another. 

__Really, I loved you  
It’s because I loved you so much  
Because I want to forget you but I can’t  
That’s why I want to forget 

__Really I loved you  
That’s why it’s so hard  
I want to hate you but I can’t  
I hate you for that 

“Wow,” Director Kim says as the last chords fade into silence. He taps his pencil against the small notebook on which he writes a couple of things. 

Brian and Jae jump, both of them forgetting that Director Kim has been standing there for the past seven or so minutes. They look at him, bewildered. Brian offers a crooked grin. Jae adjusts his glasses. Director Kim is grinning at them, looking back and forth between them. 

“Well. What’s the verdict, Director Kim?” Brian asks, running a hand through his hair. “Please put us out of our misery. Because if you want us to change the whole--” 

“--you didn’t  _ look _ miserable at all, Mr. Kang,” Director Kim remarks. “And for the record, I really enjoyed that arrangement. Although I’d suggest maybe something a little bit more uplifting for the end? What made you decide on that song? It’s so sad. Lost love doesn’t exactly scream  _ graduation. _ ” 

“The melody isn’t super sad, though,” Jae comments. “We put some kick in there, a little harmony.” 

“Well, come up with something a bit more hopeful that won’t leave the audience in tears? Just that and it’s all good for the showcase.” 

They both nod. 

“Also. On the topic of the showcase--I’d suggest finding people to play back-up for you guys? Younghyun, don’t you live with Dowoon? You two could use with a meter; in some parts the tempo goes a little bit whack. Also, maybe Wonpil could play the piano for you two if he’s done with his finals by then. I’m guessing the ballads at  _ least  _ have some keyboards? Synth? That’d be Compo 101.”

Brian and Jae glance at each other. “Yeah, sure." 

They hadn’t written any piano parts--yet.

“Okay, good. Feel free to add whatever you think is lacking. Maybe some  _ actual _ acoustic? Park Sungjin might be able to help--although he’s got his own showcase to worry about. It’s a lot of pressure graduating top of the class. We’ll have a final rehearsal in two weeks, Monday before the performance in the main auditorium with everyone else--just give me the final line-up so that I can reserve the equipment. Think up your outfits too because I’d like to see them, make sure the look is cohesive.”

Jae sighs. “Got it, Teach.”

“Also. Can I just say that I’m a genius for pairing you two together? The entire faculty thought I was crazy but wow--the chemistry, your harmonies. Good job, me.”

Brian narrows his eyes. “Excuse me, Director--did you just... _ compliment _ yourself?” 

Director puts on his signature wide-brimmed hat, winks at them. “Of course.” 

With that, he gathers his things and walks out of the practice room.

Jae grins. “Genius, that man. Self-complimenter, obviously has great taste when thinking of people who will sing well together and who are attracted to each other--” 

Brian sighs, throws his guitar pick at Jae. 

Jae catches it, throws it back at him. “--what? Tell me I’m wrong, then.”

Brian starts packing up his bass, doesn’t say a word as picks up his case, slings it over his shoulder, and loops an arm around Jae’s waist. He grins at the way that Jae blinks at him in surprise. 

With that, Brian closes the distance between them, kissing Jae softly. Jae smiles against Brian’s lips.  _ I’ll probably never get used to how good that feels.  _

“You’re absolutely, unerringly correct.” 

  
  


“Hey, boi,” Jae says, chancing upon Bernard right as he’s about to head into their dorm room. He half-tackles him, Bernard dropping his books. “Oh crapsterradio--sorry--” 

Jae helps Bernard pick the books up, grins when he sees Bernard pulling his signature “what now” face: mouth pressed into a straight line, eyes rolled up into the back of his head. Jae laughs, shoves at him until his face goes back to normal. 

“What’s wrong witchoo, boi?” Bernard fires back, unlocking the door and letting them into their room. He glances at his watch. “Hold up, what’re you doing here? Isn’t this the time of day that you’re usually out with Bri-Bri?”

Jae closes the door behind him. “I have seriously never called him that.”  _ At least not to his face.  _

“And anyway, I’ll have you know that he is currently at his house arranging for some heavy back-up on Operation Jaehyungparkian--and I pretty much bailed too because I need time to work on his graduation gift.” 

“Oooh, Jae’s pulling out all the stops--you’ve got it bad, boi--” 

“--oh, Nakjie, Jae _ does  _ got it bad and when he got it bad he goes all the way--”

“--TMI--”

“--oh no, we haven’t had s--”

“--Jesus, Jae--” 

“--anyway as I was trying to say. My gift for Brian has to be special because he is also my favorite comic artist in the world. Would I deign to give Stan Lee anything better than my Peter Parker-grade jokes? Of course not. So I wouldn’t be able to give Brian--”

“--I didn’t know you draw--” 

“--why don’t you ever let me finish my sentences? I’m going to dress up as his lead character and then well, you know, I dunno--I’m not saying we’ll go there but I’m thinking of getting a roo--”

“--JAE!” 

“--WHAT! We’re both mature gentlemen here, aren’t we? You tell me about how you’re taking Coco out on a romantic evening why can’t I tell you how I plan to get Kang Younghyun, hottest bassist--no scratch that, musician on this side of the planet--no scratch that, the whole damn world--to fall for me?’

“He’s already fallen for you.”

“People like Brian eventually get bored of people like me. He thinks he’s in love now because let’s be honest, I’m goodlookin’ but eventually the whole fast-talking, smart guy thing gets old and he’ll figure out that I’m kind of quiet and just like to sit around. So I don’t want him to ever get tired of me. I’m staying on my toes.” 

Bernard sighs, taking a seat at his desk. “To his credit, I feel like if Brian didn’t dig you dig you, he probably would still be throwing sodas in your face, but fine. I’m a good friend. I will be supportive. Is it going to be candlelit? If so, can I vomit?” 

Jae flops onto the bed. 

“No! Nakjie. Really? Whose cliche grandma are you thinking is going to plan this damn thing? See the way that the webcomic ends is that they both find out their secret identities and just stay true to themselves: stop putting up personas and move away, living life together as a couple, trying to resolve their differences.”

Bernard rolls his eyes. “I’ve never heard  _ that  _ plotline before.” 

Jae holds up a page of the zine that Brian--err, YoungK--had given him. “Look at him. El Gitarista. Sunny. I could totally dress up as him, right? I figured I could reenact one of the scenes where Sunny, not knowing that his mortal enemy is his boyfriend, uses his Deadly Serenade--of course it doesn’t work because people who are in love with the person performing it are exempt--I mean I already have that shirt, my glasses kind of look like that--”

“--oh for crying out loud, Jae. That’s because that IS you. Don’t you get it yet? Brian was projecting his real feelings for you onto the damn comic! That’s you. You would literally be dressing up as you. That’s just a slightly skewed version of your blue flannel. And look at Sej! He even has Brian’s earrings! Brian is the kind of guy who’ll end up writing the great American novel before admitting things to himself that he doesn’t want to admit even if it’s glowing and about to explode in his face--”

Jae doesn’t say anything, just stares stock-still at the zine in his hand. 

“HOLY CRAP. HOLY CRAP, BERNARD YOU’RE A GENIUS I KNOW EXACTLY WHAT TO DO!”  

  
  


“It’s still so weird,” Wonpil says, standing poised by his keyboard. He’s wearing a garish but kinda cute plaid pink sweater that Jae half-abhors, half wishes he owns. The lights in the practice room are dimmed for effect. 

Jae is tuning his guitar, the scale of C playing on loop. 

Sungjin nods from the production booth where he’s tweaking the output. He talks into the mic. “We’re all in the same room and you two aren’t yelling at each other, aren’t trying to kill each other, aren’t making weird jokes. It’s been almost a month and it still kind of makes me feel weird.”

Brian looks up from his bass.

“Well, get used to it.” 

Dowoon laughs from where he’s seated behind the drumset. “I don’t think it’s weird at all.” 

Jae shoots him a funny look. “Dude, even I thought it was weird for a while--through my lenses of rose-tinted attraction and defensiveness, of course--”

“Gah, you don’t count,” Wonpil says, waving dismissively at Dowoon. “You’ve been betting pro-BJ--”

“--oh my god, baby,” Sungjin says, coming out of the booth to put his hand fondly over Wonpil’s mouth. “Don’t call them that, Brian said it’s Jaehyungparkian--” 

Jae’s face lights up. He points a finger at Brian. “--AHA! You do like it!”

“Who said I didn’t like it?” Brian shoots back, deadpan.

Wonpil frowns down at his keyboard. “--what’s wrong with BJ? BJ are cute, BJ are strange but they're adorable.”

Sungjin kisses Wonpil’s ear. “You're too sweet for this world."  


“See?” Brian turns to Jae. “ _ That’s  _ what I have to deal with. Every damn day.” 

Wonpil plants a last kiss on Sungjn’s temple. 

Jae grins. “Hey, it’s kinda cute.” 

“Don’t encourage--”

Sungjin’s face brightens. “--you should be thanking us, Jae. For almost three years now, Brian has had good role models of a lasting relationship to look up to--” 

“--WHAT IN THE! Hey we asked you to play acoustic guitar not give us relationship advice. Now. Can we please get on with the set? Did everyone study the files that I sent.” Brian's voice rings loud in the small room.  


Instead of responding, Dowoon gets up from behind the set and seats himself on the cajon. “One, two--one, two, three--” 

  
  


“Sorry about how weird everyone got,” Brian says later that evening as he and Jae walk hand-in-hand along Cheonggyecheon stream. The evening breeze is cool, pleasant after almost two hours of rigorous practice in the crowded mini studio. “They haven’t been properly socialized.” 

Jae laughs. “It’s okay. I guess I’d be kind of weirded out too. I mean it isn’t everyday that the two people who’ve been driving the entire music program insane with their bickering for almost four years--”

“--develop an attraction?”

“--I was going to say fall for each other--” Jae wiggles his eyebrows.

Brian grins. “That’s a much better way to put it.”

They pause at one of the more generous overhangs that reach out over the water. Jae moves forward, letting Brian’s hand go briefly before reaching back out to help him over the embankment and onto the ledge. They sit on the ledge, their feet hanging over the water, the current skimming the soles of their shoes. He knows that Jae loves it here--he says so every time they visit--likes the art, the busking, the couples sitting on the steps by the water. And Brian, well, Brian likes the way that Jae likes it.

“I really love it here.” 

“I know.” 

They’d driven here in Brian’s van, had gotten early dinner at a galbi place--Jae showing Brian the  _ artisanal _ way of eating galbi cheese fondue: flick of the wrist, he kept saying, until Brian had taken a bite right out of the piece he was holding and they’d both burst out laughing. It’s times like these that Brian’s come to enjoy the most--both of them meandering, kind of aimless, easy, that playfulness between them never quite wavering. He keeps waiting for it to, keeps bracing himself for it: they say that people get bored, eventually, that even love-hate cools eventually. But here they are, almost a month into it. 

Every time their eyes meet, his heart still does that stupid shuddery thing. 

Hi, hello. 

Like a pick-up truck driving by when you need it the most, like sunshine peeking through the clouds when you least expect it.

Jae’s hand is warm in his. He’s caught off-guard when Jae turns from the water to look at him.

“Hey, Brian.”

“Wow, so serious.” 

“I’m allowed to be sometimes, right?” 

Brian smiles. “Of course. What is it?” 

“Are you free the Friday before the showcase?” Jae squeezes his hand. “I mean. Like. All night?”

Brian’s eyebrows furrow. He takes in Jae’s expression: serious, a little nervous.

“I think so? Why what do you have in mind?” 

A blush creeps up Jae’s neck, his cheeks, the tips of his ears. He takes a deep breath. He tries to put on his usual face of joking and bravado but falters. When he speaks, his voice is soft. 

“Since you’ve obviously fallen for my charms both on and off the interwebs, I was wondering if a) I could give you my graduation gift that night and b) maybe we could make an evening of it--and spend the night together. Like. For real.” 

Brian feels his heart flutter: takes in the moment--right now, both of them sitting by the water, the sun setting in the distance, Jae’s smile brighter than a million lanterns floating up to kiss the horizon. He brings Jae’s knuckles up to his lips, kisses each one. 

“Of course.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> LET'S HAVE A HAPPY COMEBACK IN A FEW HOURS! <3333 :) 
> 
> PS Jae has DEFINITELY called Brian Bri-Bri: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qSGFVzUHG7U


	11. Chapter 11

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You and I have finally become one.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A shitton of smut and fluff in this one.
> 
> Twitter - @teenuviel1227

“Where are you going, all fancy-looking like that, boi?” Bernard asks Jae on the Friday afternoon before their final showcase. Jae is standing in front of the mirror, doing up the buttons on his shirt, tucking and untucking the hem to see which looks better. “Showcase practice?”

Jae doesn’t say anything, just grins at Bernard in the mirror.

“Oh god. Hot date with BriBri?”

“Not just _a_ hot date, Bernard. _The_ hottest date. Well, actually, I guess if you look at the way life goes, let’s hope this is the least hot date--meaning things will only get better, only get hotter as we hustle together in the future: getting our careers together, literally making beautiful music together. But seriously, like. It needs to be _the_ hottest date.”

“Okay.”

“You’re not gonna ask what we’re doing?”

Bernard pauses, leans back against his pillows. “Well. Each other, I’m assuming?”

“Remember how you told me previously that your rumor mill was saying Brian was a good kisser?”

Bernard narrows his eyes. “...yes?

“Getreadyforawkwardnessbecauseit’scomingrightnow--”

“--wait, what--”

“--has anyone mentioned if Brian the most attractive man on earth is a top or a bottom because personally I like to top but I don’t mind switching if he’s into that and not knowing just makes me really scared I don’t want to offend--”

Bernard lets out a scream, covering both of his ears with his hands. “JEEEEEZUS LORD WHY WOULD YOU TELL ME THAT JAE I DON’T WANT TO KNOW YOU THAT WAY!”

“So?” Jae pulls a denim blue blazer on. “Anything?”

“NOTHING,” Bernard says, ears still covered. “NOTHING NOTHING NOTHING!”

“Fine, jeez. Thanks, Nakjie. I appreciate it Wish your boy good luck.”

Bernard rolls his eyes. “Goodluck!”

 

“It feels weird that I’m not driving,” Brian says as Jae steers the rental he’d borrowed for the evening off of the highway and into Incheon. Brian wasn’t quite sure what to expect for tonight so he’d decided to keep it simple, to stick to an outfit he knew that he looked good in--a white shirt under a denim cut-off vest, dark jeans, boots. He watches the light from the streetlamps play off of Jae’s face: he’d really dressed up, white shirt, blazer, hair swept back (it’s growing out really well, Brian can’t help but think).

“Well,” Jae says, turning left onto one of the bigger avenues. “It’s my graduation gift to you, it makes sense that I would drive. And you drive me everywhere, like, fifty thousand percent of the time.”

Brian shrugs. “I like doing it for you.”

Jae grins. “Stop being perfect, it’s physically hurting me.”

“Hah! Take your own advice.”

Jae snorts as they pull up to one of the cozier hotels--pretty but unobtrusive, warm light spilling out onto the driveway. Jae signals to the valet as he pops open the trunk and takes his and Brian’s overnight bags. Brian watches him and tries not to swoon: there’s something about the way that Jae takes charge of situations, the way that he goes from being this languid, lanky goofball to a whole grown man who knows exactly what he wants that gets Brian every time. His heart is pounding in his chest. He’d seen a glimmer of it that first time that they’d made out--the way that the corner of Jae’s mouth had turned up ever-so-slightly in a small smirk before Brian had kissed him, as though he’d gotten exactly what he wanted.

As though Brian was exactly what he’d wanted. (He is.)

The bellboy helps them with their things as Jae takes care of the check-in, taking the key-card and directing them to the designated elevator. They look at each other in the mirrored lift wall. Brian taking in Jae’s tall, lanky frame, long legs, big hands, Jae taking in the sturdy line of Brian’s shoulders, graceful neck, lean arms. Jae winks at him in the mirror. Brian rolls his eyes but can’t stop grinning.

Jae reaches for Brian’s hand, entwines their fingers.

Brian squeezes Jae’s hand tight.

The elevator lets out a light ding as they arrive at their floor. They walk down the carpeted hallway to their door, Room 0907, at which Jae tips the bellboy and they’re finally left alone.

“Ready?” Jae asks, holding up the keycard.

“Ready.”

 

“This is ridiculous,” Brian says, grumpy as he sits on the edge of the bed, blindfolded. He’d expected a lot of things: maybe a candlelit dinner, maybe roses or whatever--but as soon as they’d gotten into the room, Jae had dropped their things on the floor and covered his eyes, struggling until he got a proper blindfold over Brian’s eyes. He’d briefly seen the layout of the room: the bed, the small couch, french doors that open up onto what he’s guessing is a small terrace.

“What was it you told me on our first date? You make it hard for a guy to be romantic?” Jae says. Brian can hear him puttering about, can hear a couple of things being put on top of different surfaces: wine in an ice bucket, the clink of glasses against a marble surface (a table?), the click of Jae’s guitar case.

“Are you going to play me a song? I can still _hear_ you know. And if you borrowed that guitar from here, you’re going to have to tune it first because they probably have it on show band setting.”

“Brian?”

“Mmm?”

“Shut up and trust me.”

Brian chuckles a little, is about to make a quip when he hears Jae’s soft padding across the room, hears the balcony doors creak open.

“You’re not going to throw me off the balcony are you? Plot twist: he really _did_ hate him.”

Jae laughs, walks back to where Brian is sitting, helping him up. “Only one way to find out.”

Brian sighs but lets himself be led, feels the rush of cool win against his face as they step out onto the balcony.

“Okay,” Jae says as he lets go of Brian, picks up his guitar. “When I say three, take off the blindfold.”

Brian’s heart is pounding in his chest, nods. “Okay.”

“One, two, three--”

Brian takes off the blindfold and Jae is standing on the balcony, holding his guitar. Brian barely has time to take everything in: the view is of the hotel courtyard, the pool. Green grass framed by vines, flowers. Jae signals to someone and the hotel staff release a number of floating lanterns they’d previously been holding down. The lanterns come ablaze and float upward one by one into the night sky until everything is dotted in warm light, reflecting off of the pool water.

“Make a wish.”

Brian smirks. “It’s already come true.”

Jae starts to pluck the opening melody to that song--the one that Brian had on his playlist on their first date. Brian’s heart feels like it’s a horse about to gallop right off of a cliff. He watches Jae grin, not taking his gaze off of Brian. Brian does his best not to blink, wanting to see everything, to commit everything to memory.

_All those days, watching from the windows_   
_All those years, outside looking in_   
_All that time, never even knowing_   
_Just how blind I’ve been_

_Now I’m here, blinking in the starlight,_   
_Now I’m here, suddenly I see_   
_Standing here, it’s all so clear_   
_I’m where I’m meant to be_

_And at last I see the light_   
_And it’s like the fog had lifted_   
_And at last I see the light_   
_And it’s like the sky is new_   
_And it’s warm and real and bright_   
_And the world has somehow shifted_   
_All at once, everything looks different_   
_Now that I see you_

 

Brian blinks away the tears, his heart swelling with joy and love for Jae and about a billion other things that he can’t quite find the words to express. He moves toward Jae, steadying the guitar before taking it from Jae, removing the strap and setting it down in its case. He brushes Jae’s hair back, runs his thumbs across Jae’s soft cheeks. Jae blinks at him, puts a finger to Brian’s lips.

“Don’t you dare say it first, I’ll kill you.”

Brian laughs softly. “Fine. Hurry up then.”

“I love you, Kang Younghyun.”

Brian kisses Jae softly, feeling his heartbeat racing too. “I love you too, Jaehyung Park.”

 

They start slow, as always--achingly, achingly, slow. They’d managed to finish off the bottle of wine, the strawberries dipped in chocolate. Now, the curtains are drawn, only the mood lights turned on. Jae is draped between Brian’s parted legs, Brian’s back flush with the headboard as they kiss slow but deep, each tongue eager to savor the other. Jae’s managed to work Brian’s vest off, to undo the button on his jeans--Brian has torn off Jae’s blazer, thrown it onto the floor, unbuttoned everything so that he’s free to run his hands over the soft skin of Jae’s chest, his torso, keeping his hands on Jae’s waist.

Jae slowly presses himself lower onto Brian, feeling with one hand for Brian’s boner through the denim of his pants. He palms slow, enjoying the way that Brian’s breath hitches, the way that his hands run more urgent against Jae’s nipples the more Jae touches him. He licks up into Brian’s mouth before sucking on his lower lip slow, gently, as if showing him what he’d like to do his cock. Brian mewls, hands undoing the clasp on Jae’s pants before reaching back to squeeze his ass, pressing Jae’s cock flush with his own. Jae buckles from the want of friction, the drag just enough to drive him crazy.

“Jesus Christ,” Jae says into Brian’s mouth, his voice hoarse, cracked.

“It’s Brian Kang but I’ll take that as a compliment.” He kisses Jae’s neck urgently, peels Jae’s buttondown shirt off of his shoulders as he kisses wet, slow, hot, before moving lower and sucking hickeys onto Jae’s chest, leaving his nipples last, licking over them, pinching until they’re hard against his thumbs.

Brian pulls Jae’s shirt off, suddenly overcome with the urgency to see him--all of him. Jae’s thumbs find the belt loops on Brian’s jeans, tugging until they pool at his hips.

“Clothes,” Jae says. “I hate clothes.”

At that, Brian takes off his shirt, shimmies his pants lower. Jae watches him in the dim light: the curve of his shoulders, the tensing in his arms, the line of his torso.

“You too,” Brian says, slowly pushing Jae’s pants off of his hips.

Jae nods, getting up off Brian for a moment to discard the rest of his clothes. Brian does the same, kicking off his jeans, his boxers, finally letting his erection spring free. He watches Jae’s back, the careful way that he moves as he peels off his pants, underwear, before tossing them onto the floor. When he turns to face Brian, Brian’s eyes travel south--Jae is hard, fully hard, just from the grinding they’d been doing.

“Damn.”

Jae shrugs. “I’ve been thinking about tonight for a long time.”

Brian grins, wonders how things are going to go--wonders how they’re going to do it. “Come here.”

Jae lowers himself back onto Brian, both of them shuddering as slicked nipples come into contact with soft, dry ones as their erections come flush with one another, goading each other on, harder. Jae tugs on Brian’s hair, kissing down the hollow of his throat, his free hand drawing figure-eights onto the hollow of his pelvis.

“Fuck--”

“--how do you want it tonight, BriBri?”

Brian lets out a gasp as Jae strokes them both against each other, as he’d done that first night in his van. Brian moans, wondering if it’s okay--wondering if they’ll be compatible, wondering what Jae wants too. He feels his hole flutter in excitement at the thought. He feels blood rushing to his face, intensifying the already-present blush in his cheeks. He whispers his request, his desire, lips soft against Jae’s ear.

“I--want you inside me, Jae.”

Jae looks at him with wide eyes. “Are you sure? I--I want to. But if you wanted--the other way, I want you to know I’m down, I’m--”

“--I want you inside me.”

“Okay,” Jae says nodding. “Alright.”

With that, he kisses Brian deep, all teeth and tongue before making his way down, down, kissing Brian’s hole softly before blowing the lightest breath onto it. When it puckers, Jae catches the bloom and licks--softly in, softly around.

“Fuck,” Brian’s hips hitch. Jae catches Brian’s cock, starts to stroke him slowly, letting his thumb linger on the head as he kisses softly, letting his tongue flick against the sensitive space between Brian’s balls and his hole. “Oh my god, Jae--”

Jae is careful not to be intrusive, to make sure Brian feels good, pumping him slow while intensifying the rate at which he goads on his fluttering hole. He grins with satisfaction as Brian grows harder in his palm, head of his cock starting to pulse against Jae’s fingers.

“--Jae, please--I--oh f--”

Unable to resist teasing a little, Jae lets off, grins smugly. “The band is now taking requests but the audience is going to have to speak up more clearly.”

He strokes Brian’s cock faster, using the pointer finger of his free hand to trace the rim of Brian’s hole.

“I’m going to murder you.” Brian’s hair is matted with sweat to his temples, to his nape. He thrashes under Jae, tries to regain control of his body whilst ultimately giving up to Jae’s minisitrations.

“That doesn’t sound like a request.” Jae scooches closer, letting his own hard cock graze Brian’s.

“Fuck. Fucking--I swear to god--Park Jaehyung--”

“Oh, whole names. What is it, Kang Younghyun?”

Brian’s hands grip the sheets. “Fuck me. Put your goddamn cock inside me and fuck me.”

“He’s so rude--”

“--please. Fucking please. Please fucking fuck me. Make love to me. Cum inside me.”

Jae blinks. “You’re so hot. Okay, BriBri. Okay.”

He reaches for the bottle of lube by the pillow.

“Let go of my cock and I swear to god--”

Jae grins, keeps stroking Brian’s cock as he squirts a generous helping of lube onto his cock. “--yes, Sir.”

He smears more lube onto Brian’s hole to make sure nothing hurts before slowly guiding himself inside. They both tremble, eyes closing, sweat dripping between them. Brian’s back arches as he gets used to the stretch, the feeling of Jae hard inside him. Jae’s arms tremble as he lets Brian’s cock go to be able to brace himself against the bed.

“Oh my god. Holy crap. You feel so good, Bri,” Jae says, leaning down to kiss Brian softly on the lips. “I--you’re so warm, so fucking tight.”

Brian puts his arms around Jae’s neck, uses his thumbs to graze the hair on Jae’s nape before hooking his legs around Jae’s waist, balls of his feet coming flush with Jae’s ass, pushing him deeper into him. “Oh yeah. Let me have it, Jae. Let me fucking have it.”

Jae thrusts, deep, slow at first--and then faster as Brian’s moans grow more urgent, his fingers digging into the skin of Jae’s back from passion. He keeps going until he feels it: the soft swell of Brian’s prostate against his cock, hits it once--and then again, again, again, each time more furiously until Brian loses his words, cries out gibberish, everything lost except Jae’s name as he grunts and moans, mewls and whimpers for his release.

And then Jae pushes in, hard, one last time before Brian cums all over himself, pulling Jae down into a kiss, biting hard on Jae’s lip before licking into his mouth, touching tongue to tongue. He pulls Jae in deeper, putting pressure on Jae's ass with his soles, Jae thrusting once, twice, before cumming into Brian, chasing both of their climaxes, going until they both have nothing left, white cum all over Brian’s torso, leaking out of his hole. Jae pulls out as they both start to grow soft.

Jae kisses Brian deep, tender.

“I love you, BriBri. I love you, I love you, I love you.”

Brian grins up at him. “I love you too, Jae. My Cutest Chiquito--now--can you please clean me up? I can literally feel your cum dripping out of my asshole and crusting.”

Jae smiles, kisses the space between Brian’s eyebrows before sitting up and offering Brian a hand. “Hey, Mr. Bossy. How about we take a bath together, clean each other up, huh?”

Brian grins. “Even better.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We’re almost to the end, my friends, and it’s making me super mega emo but it’s alright because I already have a million billion gajillion ideas for more fics. xD Thanks for reading and hang on for the last chapter.


	12. Chapter 12

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Me to you, you to me

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Before we begin this final chapter, I wanted to say thank you to you guys for reading this and coming on this journey with me. I wrote this fic to get myself out of a depressive rut and it really, truly worked--I am feeling lighter and happier than I have in a really long time and a big chunk of that is owed both to Day6 (of course) and you guys. You have no idea how much your comments brighten up my day. :D 
> 
> I’d also like to share this amazing bit of [fan art by Ninn on Twitter](https://twitter.com/bleu_capsicum/status/919276291442073601).

This is how they wake up: Jae curled around Brian, limbs intertwined, the sheets strewn about them. The early morning sun filters in through the white curtains. Everything swims into focus slowly and for once, Jae is grateful for his near-sightedness: the view before him is the most beautiful tilt-shift that he’s ever seen. Brian’s silver hair catching in the light, the fine fuzz on the lobe of his ear illuminated like golden dust, the curve of his cheek the most beautiful silhouette, the swoop of his neck beautiful as it disappears into his shirt. Jae grins, reassesses the way that the fabric is just a bit too big for Brian, the way that it hangs a bit too baggy over his hands which clutch the pillow. _Scratch that, my shirt._ He tightens his arms around Brian, brushes his nose against the back of Brian’s neck before kissing it softly.

Brian grins against the pillow, feeling the safest he’s felt in a long, long time--pretty much since he left home (his family, his closest friends) to move back to Seoul to study. He doesn’t have to look to know that Jae is smiling, doesn’t have to hear him say anything to know that Jae loves him--but he turns around anyway because he wants to see, to touch, to hear. As Brian turns to face him, Jae shifts to let their bodies fit, mold together, the mattress swaying as they move, Brian’s shoulder hooking under Jae’s arm, Jae’s leg slipping between Brian’s thighs, their noses just short of touching, lips short of kissing.

“Goodmorning,” Brian says, covering his mouth. His voice is deep, husky.

“Hold up--” Jae says, eyes wide.

“--what?”

“Your morning voice is the sexiest damn thing that my ears have ever witnessed. Sorry, Enrique Iglesias, my Spanish-speaking brethren. I’m all about Kang Younghyun now. And what the heck are you doing? Why are you covering your mouth?”

Jae can tell Brian’s smiling from the way his eyes narrow, the way they crinkle at the corners.

“Morning voice is sexy--but morning breath isn’t.”

“Oh come on,” Jae says, rolling his eyes. “You know I’d still kiss you five hundred percent.”

Slowly, Jae pries Brian’s hand from over his mouth. Brian’s smiling. “I hope you know what you’re getting yourself into.”

Jae smiles wide. “Did I freakin’ stutter?”

With that, Jae leans forward to kiss Brian, their lips parting for each other, both of them sucking, licking slow, soft. When they pull away, both of them just lay there, grinning at each other for a moment, watching the other bathed in sunlight and joy over the love they’d made--just the first time of an infinite number of times--the night before. It’s Brian who breaks the silence.

“I was having a really crappy week up until last night, you know.”

Jae’s eyebrows furrow with worry. “Why? What happened?”

“Well, nothing _happened,_ really. It’s more what _isn’t_ going to happen. My parents aren’t going to be able to fly in for graduation.”

“Oh no,” Jae frowns, kisses Brian’s forehead, his nose, his lips. “I’m so sorry to hear that.”

“Yeah--I’m sorry I didn’t tell you earlier. I just didn’t want to be a buzzkill.”

Jae shrugs. “You can hang out with my family. I mean it isn’t really going to replace yours but you know, it might be better than staying home alone. And maybe we can ask Bernard to videotape the showcase and we can send it over to your family after?”

Brian’s eyes widen. “Wouldn’t that be kinda weird? This is my...showcase friend, Brian? He has no family so can he have dinner with him?”

“No, this is Brian, the most talented man in the entire world, also the most handsome and the most caring and I know I said I hated him but turns out I kind of love him. So yeah. He’s also my boyfriend.”

“You’re crazy.”

Jae pulls one of the pillows up to smack Brian with. “Remember what I said? About breaking the closet down with an axe for love-hate guy because he was so hot and made my brain feel like a truck doing 180 on a summer day in the desert?”

Brian grins, his heart filling with warmth and gladness. He pulls Jae closer to him. “Mmmm. Tell me again--but like--with kisses.”

“Sorry, El Bahista, I’m taken.”

“Who’s the punk that beat me to your heart?”

“Kang Younghyun--you heard of him?”

“Yeah I heard he’s super hot and talented and you used to hate him--”

“--but turns out I love him and he’s also my boyfriend?”

“Sounds just about right.”

  


“Okay, you guys,” Sungjin says, his voice booming in the small dressing room. “Absolutely no need to be nervous. Everything will be fine. No one is going to mess up or make a mistake or anything like that. Just remain calm.”

Jae and Brian grin at each other. It’s the big night. The final performance, their graduation showcase. Their final grade relies on this--their friends, Jae’s family, are outside, waiting for them.

Tonight, they’ve decided to go the ethereal route: both of them wearing white. Jae is in a white blazer draped over an oversized white polo tucked into white denims, Brian wearing a loose white jacket with the first few buttons undone at the top in a way that drives Jae crazy, draped over matching tight jeans that drive Jae even crazier.

Everyone else is wearing navy blue.

_The night sky._

“It’s okay, babe,” Wonpil says, massaging Sungjin’s shoulders, smiling as Sungjin groans at his touch., a wave of relief and pleasure washing over his face “Don’t take it out on them. You already got through _your_ showcase. You don’t have to be nervous for them too.”

“I’m not--”

Wonpil silences Sungjin by planting a peck on his lips.

“Well, not anymore.”

“Get a room, you two,” Dowoon says as he packs his extra drumsticks, slipping them into his back pocket. He nods toward the doorway leading into the hall to the backstage area. “And come on, it’s almost showtime.”

Brian and Jae glance at each other. Brian stands up first, brushing off his jeans and offering Jae his hand.

“Well, my Sunny boy--shall we?”

Jae grins, letting Brian pull him to his feet.

“Let’s hustle, baby."  


 

The entire hall is hushed, the gasp of awe rushing like a wave onto the shore as they begin: the soft guitars kicking the medley off into _Put Your Records On._ The lights come on slowly like the sun shining from behind a cloud. The layers of music build slowly, both Jae and Brian just singing for the first number--Sungjin comes in first with the acoustic guitar, Wonpil softly trickling a soft piano melody into the song, and Dowoon joining in last with the cajon. Jae and Brian trade lines and harmonies easy, practiced a million times, both of them knowing each other’s idiosyncrasies, vocal ticks--the audience bursts into applause as Jae and Brian’s voices mingle, dance, lilt up and over each other into the first chorus. When the melody shifts, the slide of the electric guitar kicking in over the playful bass, Brian starting them off with the _one, two, three_ as Jae sings the first lines to _Shape of You_ , the lights turn a smooth blue, bathing everyone in cool light. Brian sings the pre-chorus, their voices building and mingling into the chorus, all of them gearing up for the first original song.

Brian jumpstarts _Like That Sun_ by riling the audience up, leading them to clap in time to the bass drum, Jae playing the electric guitar melody on loop before they glance at each other and Brian starts to go ham with the funk on the bass. The lights pulse a bright yellow. Jae grins as he says the line about Icarus, an inside joke between them now. Brian grins, catches the next verse, both of them singing together on the chorus.

When they hit the bridge, Brian and Dowoon take the rhythm to another level, letting the bass riff and syncopation carry them into _Like This_. They move to the music, their bodies surrendering to the groove.

Brian watches Jae--light washing over honey-porcelain skin, smile still the brightest thing in the room despite the bright lighting. Jae watches Brian--thinking how much like the song he is: he makes Jae’s heart soar, makes him feel like he could never be sad ever again as long as they were together.

_Like this, yo, like this._

The song ends with Dowoon hitting the crash cymbals, cutting it short by leaning up to stop the reverb before kicking the bass drum into _Blood_. The guitars pluck their slick licks under Jae’s deft fingers, his vocals gliding smooth on the verse, everything building up to the chorus, Brian’s bass is thrumming, nice and steady as he sings the chorus.

They let the groove take them over. Brian is thinking of how everything began: of the soda spilled, of the fighting, of all the lucky coincidences that had brought them together. Jae takes the verse and finds himself thinking of how glad he is to be on the stage, how music and Brian are all he would ever need. Brian breaks into the rap verse, letting his bass go. The audience goes wild as he dances along to the final chorus. They let out a surprised gasp as they go right into _WYD_ , dropping electric for acoustic, both of them showing off their rhythm, groove, chemistry.

_It wasn’t just a thing that happened because I was bored and you were lonely._

The change is subtle but clear, the piano verse taking the rhythm and blues feel away, pushing it closer into ballad territory as they go into _Eyeless._ Jae and Brian trading the _oooh-woos_ perfectly, their voices orbiting around each other, vocal gymnastics: now, Brian singing low just as he comes down from the highest chorus, now Jae kicking into the main melody where he’d previously sung a half-step lower.

_Without you, I’m eyeless. Without you, I’m speechless._

The last guitar strains fade into silence. For a moment, the entire room is dark, the sound of acoustic guitar and piano the only thing in the room--and then the faint pre-recording of crickets in the distance before piano and guitar kick in. Jae starts on _I Loved You_ : singing the first verse before Brian comes into the second verse. The chorus surprises the audience, Brian taking the main melody but Jae taking the latter half, hitting the higher notes, letting his voice lilt like a wave cresting at high tide. Brian grins, lets his eyes half-close before he sings the harmony, just enjoying the way that Jae’s voice sounds. Brian leads them into the bridge, the last verse.

As he sings the last word, they all pause for the fraction of a moment before kicking into something upbeat but melodious, the keyboard melody taking centerstage. The song is one they’d written after their first date, one that they’d been reserving just for the two of them but which they’d decided would take the somber edge off of the previous track. They both sing the entire thing, now unable to take their eyes off of each other as they play.

_Let’s stop the awkward distance between us,_  
_It’s so frustrating._  
_You’re so close but so far._  
_Yeah it’s you._

_Day by day,_  
_I (eh eh eh)_  
_Am fulfilled by you (eh eh eh)_  
_Close my eyes and you show me_  
_Just how attracted to you I am_

_I think I’m crazy_  
_From the first moment we met_  
_I think I’m crazy_  
_I want you_  
_I want to have you_  
_Baby, you_

_You (ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh)  
You, baby (oooh-ooh-oooh-ooh) _

The song ends and the entire theater roars with applause, the lights burning bright, burnished gold. It’s almost too much as they look around at everyone they love--faculty, friends: Director Kim front-and-center, Bernard in the front row to the left taking the video for Brian’s family back home in Toronto, their best friends on stage with them--before they let their gaze settle on each other. They don’t even notice that the entire audience has gotten up from their seats and are giving them a standing ovation, they don’t hear the whistles and hoots, have eyes only for each other.

Brian mouths _I love you._

And Jae knows what he’s going to do. _Break the fucking closet down with an axe._

He swings his guitar a bit to the side, unplugging himself from his amp. Brian’s eyes are wide as Jae starts to cross the stage, closing the distance between them. _What are you doing?_

When he reaches Brian, he reaches out a hand as if to ask him to dance. When Brian puts his hand in Jae’s, Jae bows, the full ninety degrees, before kissing Brian’s hand, intertwining their fingers together. Brian’s face turns redder than the soft, crimson lights that start to twinkle on stage, spelling out _Hi, Hello_ \--the title they’d chosen for their showcase. In turn, Brian kisses Jae on the cheek. The applause is almost deafening as the rest of the band comes forward to join them and they hold hands for the final bow. The lights turn a bright white, they raise their hands--in victory, for graduation, a big congratulations--and give their final bow as music majors.

_For coffee and better days._

_I’ll remember this forever--nothing is impossible._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The next long fic is going to be a (of course) Jaehyungparkian Reply 1988-based one. Please anticipate, I will be posting teasers and things on [Twitter](http://twitter.com/teenuviel1227) and you can leave requests/prompts/reactions/messages/whatever (but let’s keep it polite, of course) on my [CC](http://curiouscat.me/teenuviel1227).


	13. Post-Process Notes Are Now Live // Announcement, Not Update

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After every long fic is completed (long fic = 7 chapters or more, of at least 17,000 words), I will be uploading post-process notes talking about the fic writing process and certain elements of the just-finished fic.

Hello, everyone. I thought I would include this in a separate post so that it doesn't overload/undercut your reading of the final chapter. Just a quick note to say that [Post-Process Notes](https://teenuviel1227.wordpress.com/2017/10/16/post-it-notes-i-was-me-you-were-you/) are now up on my blog. We talk about metafiction, Tangled, various tropes (and subverting them), Setting as an element of fiction, and some notes on writing dialogue. Thanks again for reading--see you guys in the next one!


End file.
